Well That's Over...

The happy birthday is over.   I doubt that will ever return.  I'm having to face somethings.  Everything in my life is making decisions to make an easier time for themselves.  The problem is that every time they do this, they're adding on to my list of things to handle or have at least have a hand in handling.  My doctor may be lightening his office load.   That means I may be out of a doctor & will have to find another.  My dentist has changed again.  I'm not sure to what extent, but that could mean me having to find another dentist.  The landlord wants to make changes to something which will leave us to handle it.

Had an argument with my roomie yesterday.  She had been editing me the last couple of months, not to raise my voice.   When these occurrences happened, I wasn't angry, but apparently I was too loud.  The 1st thing of the argument yesterday & she was screaming at me.   We didn't talk for most the day.  I told her how pissed off I was because I was left alone in the hospital when I got pneumonia.  Maybe I should've said something earlier, but how do you bring up something like that.  How do ask someone, "Why did you leave alone there?" I wouldn't have done that to her.

She's looking into somethings to help her life.  To make her mobility easier.  Great.  Except for I'll also have to adjust to all of that newness.  I'll have load & unload the device.  I'll have to slow down, carry more, push the chair, etc..

Everyone is asking to be given some slack.  But, I'm the person at the end of the rope.  There's no slack for me, just people adding more.  My roomie wrote a rant post last night & then  deleted it.  I'm fine with people ranting, even about me.  They're letting off steam.  She basically said I should just leave.  She said I should go make friends with people in better situations, like I just wanted to use them.  I don't want to use people, I just get tired of being used all the time.  She doesn't think I notice what she does do.  I notice.  I just didn't think she needed a parade for helping out around the house.  

This post might start another argument.  But, I've had to face somethings as well.  I'm alone.  If I ever have to move by myself or go in a home.  I'll never see anyone I know ever again.  I guess it's time to get used to that.

I'm glad the cats are getting closer to her.  At least I won't have to worry about them if I have to do something.  I know she didn't mean me to see that post, but I did.  I guess to her, I'm just a miserable person, her words, not mine.  Now would be a good time, just not have woken up this morning.

I've got to go.  I have stuff to do & then shopping. 

Cya...