Missing Articles...

 

There haven't been many articles in a while.  Those that do get posted are mostly rehash & restatements.  This happens sometimes, but this time is different.  The dearth of HIV news seems to be due to a single factor, funding.  

Ever since tRump started screwing with monies that weren't his to handle; treatment, testing, outreach & research have begun to wither.  It's not just HIV, many areas of medicine are feeling it.  While the orange asshat may have led the charge, it's congress' fault for not doing more.  

Let's be clear, if you support tRump, MAGA, MAHA or  their other enablers, you are part of the problem.  You are helping to harm people.  Don't ever consider yourself a good person.   You're a vindictive twit who wanted to hurt people who weren't like you.  Problem for you it that things like this don't stay contained.  It will eventually take you with it as well.  Enjoy the ride.

Cya...

Another Loud Saturday Morning...

 

This makes the 3rd Saturday morning in a row I was woke up by some horrible noise.   Heavy trains moving so fast they sound like small aircraft are a given these days.  Add wet or cold tracks & the noise is even more intense.

But these last Saturdays the source has been over zealous yard work.  Each time, it's been just after rain, but still they mow, trim, weed-eat & make their cacophony of seussian noise with their yard machinery.  This morning was a tree being taken down by obnoxious chainsaws.  Then there were loud trucks taking things away.   Racket & asshats always seem to go together.  Both are loud & annoying.  

Cya...

Not Good Morning...

 

I'm running late.  I didn't sleep well & jolted awake.   I got agitated when the net dropped out on us right before going to bed.  Then the outside noise kept waking me.  I fell back asleep & then overslept.  Noise startled me awake & now I'm running late.

Optimum sucks & is somehow worse than Suddenlink.  I blame the fiber.   Ever since they shifted to fiber, the net's been down a lot more & takes the cable with it.  The worst part of it is that's rarely an issue near us, they don't give not repair time estimates & they never say what happened.

I'd call Optimum rude, but you're mostly dealing with AI crap.  When you do get a person, they rarely have enough experience to help you.  That's if you can understand them.

That's all.  I need to head out.

Cya...

Injectables & Adherence...

 

Since the beginning of HIV treatment, the game has been the same.  Medications have to be accessible, tolerable & reliable.  Then there's adherence.  The best meds in the world won't matter if they aren't taken regularly. 

90 - 95% adherence is what's needed for HIV meds to be effective & help prevent resistance.  The aim was to create regimens that were accessible with ease of regimen maintenance.  We went from handfuls of pills to a few, to a single pill.  Now there are injectable options given weekly, monthly, quarterly & at larger intervals.  Until a cure is found, they'll probably aim for annual injections.

For many adherence is a serious challenge.  Injectables could be a much better option for many.  After taking handfuls of pills daily, a single dose at wide intervals would be astounding.  Even if it was a weekly pill, that would be a drastic improvement.  

Adherence makes this all work.  Any threat to that is a threat to that person.

Cya...

Mid-April...

 

I'm trying to get more sleep, but these hazy mornings aren't helping.  I'm still tired.  Things could get chilly weekend.  I was hoping to be to a point where it was warmer, brighter & we had more of the BS on our plate handled.  That's not happening.

Yesterday's outing didn't go as well as hoped for.  There's more left up in the air.  The bees are still here & I'm beginning to think the guy we called flaked out.  

I wish I could post something about HIV or less negative.   There weren't any good articles & I haven't had anything good to post about in a long time.    This is it for today.

Take care.

Cya...

Another Tuesday Outing...

 

We have another outing.  At least it wasn't super early this time.  We'll head out soon.

I slept better, but not so much on the waking part.  It's cloudy & may rain tonight.   Mornings like this aren't good for me.  Then again nothing much regarding my sleep has been all that great for some time.  

We have things to handle & I'll get through them, but I'm already tired.  I wish I had something that would make all of this easier on me, but I don't.  I'm doing what I can & it's seems to be less & less.

I need to get around, take care.

Cya...

Such A Monday...

 

I didn't sleep well last night.  Everything kept making noise.  The stupid cat kept charging the window to shoo an outdoor cat.  I had to push her out of my room & close the door.  She tried to get  in & rattled the door for a while.  It made my room stuffy.

I tried to call for a refill with my pharmacy, but my medical provider hadn't provided new refills.  Now I'm waiting for that.  It'd be nice if people could just do their jobs.  

There's a lot going on & there will stuff up in the air for a while.  I'll be lucky if crap settles down before Summer starts.  A lot of people just need to die for making everyone else's life so much more difficult.

That's all for this morning.  I still have shower, go shopping & yes I'm running late.

Cya...

More More More...

 

We had a bit of good news Friday & I should've known that wasn't actually a good thing.   A single thing off our load & we got more dumped on us almost immediately.  Besides the ongoing issues with this damn house.  There's another health issue & the asshat bees have returned.  I can't do anything about either issue.  

We're still finding out things & who knows how long this take.   Of course the weather is supposed to crap out.  Add to all of this, a male cat has decided he's a singer & won't shut up.   He's been going all morning.

Yesterday was hard.  I'm not sleeping well.  I spent most of the day with a low, anxious buzz.  I'm so over it even my cheeks feel tired.  I'm want everything to shut up & work.  If this is all that's left in my life, just let me off the ride.

Cya...

Neighborhood Noise...

 

For a long time this neighborhood was pretty empty & little too quiet.  It bordered on creepy.  Then people moved in & there was more presence.  That in itself was not a bad thing.  Sure some of our neighbors are mow junkies, but that's not usually a problem.

For a while now, the traffic in our area has increased.  These aren't locals, they're passing through.  They're very noisy.  The trains running in our area have increased, gotten faster, longer & far louder.   I used to just sleep through trains, but now a lot of them wake me.  I'm not sure why, but we have an abundance of sirens at night.  They don't come nearby, they're just cutting through.  

This morning some asshat decided to mow at dawn with a giant mower.  It was loud & stupid.  I understand mowing early when it's hot, but we're may hit 80° today.  It also dumped nearly 0.5" yesterday afternoon.  The grass is still soaked.

I'm glad we have neighbors & the area isn't a ghost town any more, but the noise is ridiculous.  Still most of it isn't the people living nearby, it's jerks passing through, trains, sirens & landlords with huge lawn mowers.

There's my rant for this morning.  Take care.

Cya...

Back To Morning Ugh...

 

Even with the light, mornings have been really hard lately.   I wake up & I'm fine for a little bit & then it hits me.  It's not panic.  It's just a sense of everything being off & so much that I'm practically vibrating.  

My cat can vibrate when she's angry, but this is something else.  I'm not raging or panicking.  It's like I'm trying to expel or shed something.  Everything in the morning seems so much more urgent, demanding & loud. 

Whatever it is, it's overwhelming & tiring.  It takes me a while to shake it.  It's usually passed by the time my morning routine is done.  During that time, I'm an irritable mess.  Maybe this is my body finally dealing with all the SAD issues & trying to rid itself of it.  Whatever it is, I hope it fades soon.

Cya...

Enjoy The Sunshine...

 

It's sunny this morning & it might be the last bright morning for a while.  Storms & rain are in the upcoming forecast.  Again, we need the rain, but I need the light.  

I've been trying to get out of this funk I've been in for a while.  It isn't working well.  There's too much ongoing & newly added crap buzzing in my head.  The light won't stay more than a day or so.  

The weather could lighten up some.  It'd be nice if some things just fell in line & got out of our lives for a while.  Maybe.

Cya...

Rough Mornings...

 

I've been trying to get better sleep.  I think I actually am, it's just not doing any good.  It's a bright morning & I woke up well enough at 1st.  I didn't jolt or anything.  For a bit I'm fine & then I'm not.  I'm just lowkey anxious, irritated & overwhelmed.  

Things haven't been that great for me.  It's be a lot of going.  Now, it seems like I'm going to lose some things.  There's a sense of something.  Dread's too strong a word, but something unpleasant is headed my way & I'm not going to be able to avoid it.

I'm tired of losing, confrontations, stress, illness, feeling so spent, etc...  I'm really over sounding like a sound-bite.  That's my life, suck on repeat.  There is no better, it's only downhill.  Everytime I think there may be something else, I'm shown how wrong I was.

That's my meh post for this morning.

Cya..

Letting Go....

 

We're almost 100 days into 2026.  It was OK for a bit. But since then, I feel like I've just been sinking & getting mired in things around me.  I haven't felt well & things just keep going by & adding on.  

I don't have much for distractions or simple pleasures left in my life.  The main 1 had has gotten to the point of not being maintainable.  2  years ago, it was half the price & lasted about a month.  Now, with the price doubled it's going by way too fast.  Another thing, I'll let go of.  That's getting close to the end of things.   I guess this what they mean by not being able to have nice things.

I'll try to look at it in a way that I'm saving money & calories.  Still, it wasn't something I wanted to do.  But, there it is.  Another thing gone.  I'm done.

Not a good morning.

Cya...

Nothing New, Just Repeat...

Spring is supposed to be about renewal.  I'm not seeing that.  It's all just the same old, same old & sliding into worse.  To be supportive, I have to let myself believe something isn't just possible, but at least somewhat feasible.  The same patterns have played out again & now the slide has happened.  It's nothing new & I can only focus on myself for being complicit by trying to be encouraging.   That's on me.  

It's a couple of steps forward & then years backward.  I just need to accept, this is the best it's going to be & things probably only get worse from here out.  I'm not angry at anyone but myself, just a little disappointed.  

So much for happy renewal.   It's just the same muddy, BS trenches.  I should've known.

Cya...

It's Easter

 

Ostara has passed & Easter is here.  It's sunny this morning.  It doesn't look like there'll be much of that this month.  There's a 10 day steak where it could rain or storm.   The rain is needed, but I need the light.  

I'm sleeping better & waking hasn't been jolty.  Still, I'm still tired & needing everything to line up so I can get more rest.  Maybe a bit more of this & I won't feel so spent.

Happy Easter, good hunting.

Cya...

Stormy Morning...

 

It's been storming all night.  It's not been too bad, but there's been a lot of rain.  The Weather Channel has us over 2.5".  We need rain.  It'd be nice to make up for the deficit that's been running since January.

There isn't anything else happening here.  I'm fine with that.  We need some down time.  This is it, take care.

Cya...

More Needed...

 

It's going to be a colder, stormier weekend.  We need the rain, but not the storms or darkness.   We've been short on rainfall this year.  

I managed to get a decent night's sleep.  It wasn't enough.  I'm still worn out.  A single night isn't going to cut it.  It doesn't help this morning is hazy, windy & pollen ridden.

It's the 1st of the month & bills must be handled.  Then we'll go be shopping, check mail & hopefully home.  I've had enough outings for a bit.

That's all for now, take care.

Cya...

It Begins...

 

The yard work of 2026 has begun.  April 1 was the 1st mowing & spraying.  There'll be more of both.  It rained last night, so it'll be a bit before I can handle bugs & any plant stuff that needs hauled to the curb.  

I was already not feeling good.  Add weed spray, mowing, pollen, wind, etc... & I'm pretty done in for the moment.  I'll get over it, but it's going to take a bit.   

That's all for now, hopefully no more early runs for a bit.  I need the sleep.  Take care.

Cya...

Hello April...

 

April is here.  I hope it turns out to be easier than March.  This will be another short post.  We have to head out soon for an appointment.  Yet another early morning.  I hope these wind down a bit.  I don't handle mornings well.

That's all for now.  Hello April, be nice.

Cya...

Goodbye March...

 

It's the end of March.  This was a tiring month & there's still things left to do.  I haven't been feeling well & this morning's been rough.  I'm trying not to get really sick.  Mornings have been hard.

I saw a couple of articles like this piece.  Gilead is refusing to sell MSF (Doctors WIthout Borders) their long lasting prevention medication lenacapavir.  No reason has been given.  This is not a good look for the drug company.

The other article I saw was about being 50+ & living with HIV.  These articles have yet to impress me.  They usually detail the same issues anyone over 50 would face, then add HIV.   None I've read so far have been that informative.

That's all for now, Goodbye March.

Cya...

Short Post Due To Busy Morning...

 

This is going to be another busy morning.  It has been for almost a week & will continue to be for a bit.  I need to shower & go shop.  My roomie has an appointment that a friend is taking her to.  It's just a timing issue with things.  All of this while I'm just trying to wake up & function.

That's all for now, take care.

Cya...

New Med Development...

 

According to this piece, ViiV has a new long acting medication in phase 1 research.  The piece doesn't go into much detail other than obscurely listed 2 drugs in the new medication.  VH184 is list as an integrase inhibitor.   VH499 is listed a capsid inhibitor.  

At this point, there isn't much more known about the medication.  It's aimed to be another long acting medication, usually twice a year.  Another biannual med on the market could move these drugs to the forefront of treatment & drive down costs due to competition.  

That's all for now, take care.

Cya...

Spent...

 

For a long time now, I've been very tired, borderline sick from something or another.  But things kept coming.  Every time, I thought I could catch up a bit, something new popped up.   I don't think I can do this much longer.

This has been a hard month, especially this week.  Everything has been trying, demanding & needing to be handled.  For the most part, it has been, but there's still more needing done.  There always is.

This last week was harder than I expected.  It had to happen, but that doesn't change how difficult it turned out to be.   I've been exhausted since Wednesday.  We had to head out early for a thing my roomie had.  Every time estimate we were given was wrong.  I was there hours longer than I should've been.  By the time I got home, I was spent.

There's still more to handle & I don't have much I can do.  I'm just too frazzled to manage more.  Maybe in a week or so, if things calm down, I can do more again. But not now.

The chill & pollen aren't helping any.  Take care.

Cya...

Gloomy Final Friday...

 

The last weekend of March looks to be dark & colder.  It's gloomy this morning & it might rain.  Benefit renewals are in process.  My roomie is home from her appointment.   

I saw 2 articles (A & B) on suppressing HIV without meds.  Both pieces detailed an approach to handling HIV with antibodies & T-Cells.  This is a direction researchers have been looking at for a while.  At this moment it isn't widely viable.  This could lead to a new primary treatment of HIV & head away from  traditional medications.  

That's it for now, take care. 

Cya...

Roomie Pickup...

 

Yesterday was no fun.  I took my roomie to her appointment & of course everything took at least twice as long as they said.   We thought I'd be out of there by 11 AM, it was past 2 PM.  I have to head back now to pick her up.  This is about it for now.

BTW - Optimum sucks.  The net was off again yesterday.

Cya...

Short Early Post...

 

It's too early to post much.  We've got to head out early for my roomie's appointment.  I didn't notice any articles.  I'll try to post more tomorrow.

It's too dark & chilly to be up.  Take care.

Cya...

Meh Morning...

 

It's hazy & cooler this morning.  It's not been the best wake up, I'm still groggy.  There's stuff to handle today & there'll be even more tomorrow.  Tomorrow isn't going to be fun.   We have to be out of here very early & then I'll head back later.  I have little info on the actual details beyond that.  

Things are so up in the air & some of it needs to be handled soon.  There's not much I can do about any of it for now.   I'm staying tired & rattled.  Tomorrow is only going to be harder, but it has to be handled.

After that, things need to be handled.  I just want some stuff to come to an end so things can settle some.  I've done what I can & will.   It's hard to tell if this is SAD or just aggravation at all the things that have been lingering for so long.  Maybe it's both.  It just needs to end, so maybe I can stop feeling like such crap.

That's all for now.

Cya...

Busy Drop...

 

In the past week we've gone from the mid 20s to mid 90s.  That's a 70° swing.  With the pollen & wind, it's no wonder people are sick.  It dropped 20° today.  Tuesday & Wednesday will be warmer & then it should be seasonal temps.

This is will be a busy week.  In addition to our normal routine, my roomie has an appointment.  It'll require getting around very early & a return trip the following day.

Still waiting for other things to happen so we can move on with finishing our current matters.  But there's nothing more I can do at the moment.  Maybe soon.

That's all for now, take care.

Cya...

Out There...

 

I should be feeling better.  It's been brighter & warmer, but I'm still waking frazzled.   The pollen isn't helping.  It's mainly all the stuff we have hanging, waiting to be handled.  Unfortunately most of it isn't something I can do anything about.  What I can, isn't ready yet.  Some of it's stuff my roomie handles, but she's busy too.  

I'm not waking up in an angry, panicked jolt.  But I'm still opening my eyes & feeling very overwhelmed & solo.   I know I'm not alone, but there's just so much going on.  There's a lot waiting to get done.

I have no idea how things are going to playout & that rattles me.  It could be smooth sailing or utter wreckage.  I don't even know when it'll actually be over or what will be left when it's done.

I hate mornings.  There isn't enough of me that early, to put myself back together, before I deal with things.  It'd be nice if waking wasn't almost always a bad option.

Cya...

Still A Lot...

 

There's been so much on our plates for so long.  Things shift, but no space really clears.  Yesterday's net outage shouldn't have got to me as bad as it did, but I was already just skating by.  It was just another stupid thing someone or something else inflicted on us.  

This is going to be a busy week & we have so much to handle.   Spring stuff is beginning & I don't know what we'll do about that.  The problem is I can't just break for a while.  Everything else is happening at the same time.   Every time I've broken in the recent past, I've wound up in the hospital.   Those trips may have kept me going, but they only delayed what was happening at home.

2026 is wearing me out & it's only March.  The temp swings are hard.  Less than 2 weeks ago, the overnights were freezing.  It's the low 90°s for this weekend.  Add all the pollen & it's a little rough.

That's all for now, take care.

Cya...

No Net Again...

 

This will be a short post.  The internet is out & doing this with my phone is no fun.   The net has been out since 4 PM yesterday & they have no estimate for restoration.  

We have to go shopping & errands.  So far, the car is working.  We'll see if it holds.

I just really needed a day of no BS.

Cya...

Sneezy Morning...

 

The pollen levels have been high for weeks.  There's been a lot of sniffling, sneezing, coughing & eye watering.   This will probably be the way of things for a while.

The car is back.  We'll see if everything is order with it soon enough.  I'm trying to get a drug refill handled with the pharmacy.   Not much else is on the schedule for today.

That's all for now, take care.

Cya...

Rushed Morning...

 

I'm trying to get around this morning.  I'll have to handle other things later.  We have to get the car to the shop to get the door fixed.  Hopefully, this will fix the battery drain issue.  I don't have much time, so this is it for now.

Take care.

Cya...

It's Gone...

 

2026 didn't start out bad for us, especially compared to 2025.  There were new things, ideas, routines, etc...  Things were clicking.  I was still dealing with the dark of the year stuff & SAD, but it was moving along.  I guess that was it; there were plans, momentum & maybe just a sliver of hope things might improve.  

I'm not sure why I let myself buy into this.  I guess I was just tired & distracted not to see the inevitable  repeat of things.  The new things starting breaking, the routines ended, plans & ideas seem to lose focus.  The momentum was gone & it was just sliding back into breakage, stress, anxiety & frustration.  

I did this to myself.  I let myself think things might change in a good way for once.  Yet again, I was wrong.  I don't need to see 60.  None of this is going to get better for me.  It might level out, but then it'll dive back down again.  People can keep their plans, ideas & maybes.  I just can't anymore.  

Cya..

Trying Morning...

 

This last while has been trying.  We're trying to get a lot of things handled.  We're trying to get info on  other things, so that they can be handled.  We're trying to juggle appointments with other appointments & issues.   It's just a lot of trying.

I've been trying to hold it together & not let SAD overwhelm me.  I've tried to tune out the damn wind. I've been trying to get sleep & not succeeding.  I've been trying not to get mired in the hopeless mess of it all.  I'm trying, but I'm not doing very well at any of it.

It's bright out this morning, but the temps dropped & the faucets had to drip all night.  The wind wailed most of the night & it's still going.  I'm so over trying.

I guess that's it for now.  

Cya...

Wind Noise...

 

It's been windy since last night & it's supposed to continue into the early morning hours Monday.  I've gotten to where I hate the noise.  It's an inconsistent sound.  The changes make it hard to tune out.  It woke me up a few times.

As a kid, I used to love the wind.  Now, it's a lot of noise that can do damage.  It's a problem I can't mitigate.  Some people say, it's a privilege to get older, BS.  I can't name much that's been better or will be better as I age.   It's just other people rationalizing.

Today is hazy & windy.  Storms are in the forecast & then the temps are supposed to frigid for a couple of days.  I didn't want any of that, but no one asked me.

That's it for take care.

Cya...

Warm, Windy & Ridden...

 

Today is sunny & warm.  It's also windy & with lots of pollen.  This will be the end of the sunny & warm for a bit.  Tomorrow is supposed to be colder & storm.  Then the forecast calls for 2 nights under freezing.  This weather switching & pollen may be normal for this time of year, but it's still rough.

There isn't much going on today,  I'll try to enjoy the sun while it's here.   Monday will start another busy week.  After that, it'll be more roller coaster weather.  That's all for now, take care.

Cya...

2nd Friday The 13th Of 2026...

 

This is the 2nd Jason Day of the year & they're back to back.  It's supposed to be sunny today.  I should be enjoying the sunlight, but I'm not.  It's supposed to get frigid this weekend & I'm too frazzled by things to really let the light relax me.   

I keep hoping things will get off the plate so I can unwind, but they don't.  Even when some do, more crap lines up.   I'm tired of trying to focus on the after this bit, instead of now.   It could be May or later before some of this is out of lives.  By then, other BS will probably present itself.

As an adult,  all I really wanted was for sometime in my life where I could feel some happiness & security.  I'm usually too anxious for that.  I don't think those things will ever happen for me.  I'm pretty sure the rest of my leave is only going to slide down into more of this crapfest.  It'd be nice to be wrong about that.

The sunlight & little blue flowers didn't bring me out of the funk this time around.  I probably won't see any hummers again this year.  Dragons are about all that's left besides lightning bugs.  I really am tired of looking over the horizon.  I'd like to be in the now, but the now sucks.  So much for living for today.

Cya...

Cooler Thursday...

 

After a warms spell, cooler temps have returned.  We may need to have faucets dripping this weekend.  I thought we were past this.  March is a weird weather month.  

Next week starts appointments again.  We could be a bit hectic for the last half of the month.  My roomie has a lot going on & benefit renewals should be sometime soon.  

There's going to be a lot to handle this Spring.  I'm not sure there's going to be much time to come down from it all.  I'm really tired of this.  So much is impacting our lives that we have very little control over.  

I wish there were more positive things to write about.  At least it's sunny this morning, even if it is cold.  I'm really over trying to look at the bright side of things.

Cya...

More & More...

 

It's been more of things I didn't want; storms, aches, allergies, low blood pressure, off sleep & BS.  I'm tired & achy.  Allergies, low blood pressure & dehydration have wrecked my head.    It was noisy this morning, another thing screwing with my sleep.  

It's been DST since Sunday & there's been precious little daylight during that time.   Even with all these bouts of rain & storms, we're still short on our rainfall average.   So far 2026 has been a little dry.

That's it for now, take care.

Cya...

Still Adjusting...

 

The problem with this time of year is the wide swing of things.  The light levels are getting better, but dark storms are common.  It's warming & there are 80s in the forecast for highs.  Then again, the same forecasts calls for a couple of overnights just around freezing.  So, it's weird light, high pollen, storms & a 50+ temperature range.  

Those aren't easy things to adjust to.  I probably won't until things settle down some.  For now, I'm achy, tired & my morning blood pressure has been too low.  Transitions have never been my forte.  I'll get there, but for now, this sort of sucks.

That's it for now, take care.

Cya...

Ugh Morning...

 

Several factors are threatening the ongoing fight against HIV, much of it is due to republicans.  This 1st piece's topic has been in the news for weeks.  Because of cuts to medicaid & HIV programs, many states are scaling back their assistance programs.  This cost many their coverage & meds.

Due to ICE, people, even US citizens, are avoiding places that could put them in contact with the agency.  This article covers how it's impacting treatment in some communities.

This last piece is about people with HIV in Ethiopia, especially  adolescents & young adults (AYA).  It shows that women carry a higher burden when it comes to HIV, yet the research is on them is much lower than that concerning males.  This may be about Ethiopia, but the same issue regarding women has been prevalent in many studies.  This has been an ongoing complaint against current research studies & standards.

On to my morning.  This morning is dark, wet & fairly yuck.  I'm achy & tired.  It figures the 1st several days after the time change would be miserable storm BS.  I need sunlight.   My jolty morning are ramping up & leaving a depleted mess.  SAD shouldn't last into March.  It did last year & I'm hoping this isn't a thing from now on.

Wow, 3 articles in a single post.  But they're all about how we're failing in the fight against HIV.  The weather is screwing my DST.  Plus there's still everyday crap to deal with.  So, yeah, March is being just peachy.

Take care.

Cya...

DST Has Arrived...

 

There's a lot going on in our lives & a lot of it isn't great.  I have & will post more about that, but not today.  Something I've been waiting for has happened, the time change.  I'm normally not a fan of time or seasonal changes, they're hard on me.  It'll still be rough for me, but at least there's a chance for more sunlight.   My SAD won't magically disappear, but this could help with that.  

Maybe tomorrow I'll post about gloom & doom, but not now.   There's an extra hour of light in the afternoon.  It won't start getting dark at 4 PM.  I want the dark of the year in my rearview mirror.  Maybe other things can start looking forward as well. 

That's all for now, Take care.

Cya...

It's Here...

 

There were a lot of articles out, but most were the beginnings of ongoing research.   These were brief bits about what researchers are looking at, not what they've found.  A new research technique or method is important, but not a topic for a lay article.  Maybe when these ideas are fleshed out, they'll be something.

This was not an easy morning, but nothing this week has been.  It stormed hard all night & the noise kept waking me.  It's still dark & raining, so waking is has been difficult.   It figures this would happen this week.

Tonight is the time change.  We'll have more light.  Still, I never do well with the changes in the beginning.  This last few weeks have made sure it'll be harder than it needed to be.  There are some things that could've made the ongoing processes so much easier, but instead they added hazards & roadblocks.  To all that hindered us, whatever they may be, may only the worst of things come your way.

That's it.  Articles aren't ready.  Loud storms suck.  There's been too much on the plate.  Some people need to fall in a hole & never climb out.  Dark mornings are horrible.  At least the time change is here.

Take care.

Cya...

Not So Great...

 

For the last several years, I've felt off & not as well as I should.  It's never been a solid thing I could ID & there were always other more pressing issues.  I'd tried to get rest & get through it.   The last couple of years have been harder, but again there was a lot of stuff to handle.  Since September it's been a cascade of issues & appointments.  I really hoped by now, most of this crap would be off our plate, but it isn't.  

Spring is coming & that means seasonal issues; benefit renewals, storms, yard work, etc...  Everything else is still hanging on & not getting settled.  I'm doing my best.

SAD has been a real issue this year.  I was hoping it had passed for now, it hadn't.  For a while I've woke jolty several times during the night & almost every morning.  This is exhausting & takes so much from what little I had left just to get my morning started. 

I need things to stop, to be over, at least for a little while.  No more waiting, getting things fixed, piles of unknowns or difficult idiots.  I'm not fine & I'm not even sure what my best is anymore.  I'm spent & need to be done.

A lot of times, I wish I'd never made it into adulthood.  It had nothing to offer that I needed or wanted.  I wonder what if I'd died at a midnight showing of Rocky, spinning under a disco ball at the rink or even dancing under the lights at a club.  That would've been a good ending.  Instead I'll probably die in some disgustingly substandard, abysmally predictable hellhole. 

It's dark out & supposed to storm.  The upcoming week looks to be the same.  Here comes more SAD & cortisol.   Even if the sun did shine, it wouldn't matter, too much shit is still there & not going anywhere.  Being this tired, swamped by BS & dealing with this life is more than I can handle.   I don't need a refund or exchange, I just want it all gone.

There's my murky morning rant.

Cya...

Rainy Thursday After...

 

It's been raining since yesterday & shows little sign of heading out soon.   It's dark this morning.  Even with this rain, my allergies are still acting up.  We do need the rain, but not the storms or darkness.  

There won't be much happening today.  I have no interest in going out in this mess.  Bills have been mostly handled.   The rest hasn't show up yet.

My telemed appointment went alright.  It was a bit brief, but the new doctor didn't seem comfortable with the camera.  Now, I wait for them to set the next appointment.

That's all for now, take care.

Cya...

Cloudy Morning For Telemed...

 

It's dark this morning.  The upcoming may be stormy.  We need rain, but not storms.  It's making for bad sleeping weather.  It was muggy & unseasonably warm last night.

My telemedicine appointment is at 1 PM.  I need to get around, eat & get showered.  This should be a normal meeting to go over lab results.   

Other an errand or so, that should be it for that day.  Maybe I can get this done before any serious rain happens.  That's it for now, take care.

Cya...

More Busy Week Stuff....

 

The week is still busy.  We got some things done yesterday, but not everything went as we'd thought it would.  That's causing some workarounds to be thought out.    

It's time to handle bank runs & bills.  We both have appointments tomorrow.  All my labs finally made it to the specialist. 

I'll be happy when some issues get off our plate.  They've been lingering too long & there isn't much more we can do about them.  There's always more stuff to just waiting.

That's it for now, take care.

Cya...

Busy Monday...

 

It's the 1st of the month & the cycle begins again.  Besides normal things, there's an appointment today.  That means getting around a little earlier.  After shopping, we'll head out to handle that.

I'm trying to get a hold of my specialist & make sure all my labs arrived.  They're a pain to contact.  I have a telemed appointment Wednesday.

That's it for now, take care.

Cya...

Hello March 2026...

 

I didn't say goodbye to February, it was a particularly unpleasant month for us.  There was so much breakage, expense & stress.  That fails to mention all the inconvenient waiting.   That month is never easy on us, maybe next year can be a little less craptastic.

Hello March, surely you can do better.  It's a very low bar.   We both have appointments this month.  There's still some waiting going on.  Still, we've done what we can.

February barely made it's rainfall average, January didn't, we're at least 0.5" short.  I hope March can make up for it without flooding.  So far 2026 isn't getting a good review.

That's all for now, take care.

Cya...