Day 1 - New Blog Year...

 

It's still early days, but so far 2024 has behaved.  My roomie & I are apprehensive about the coming days.  2023 was a train wreck & we need at least a "doesn't suck" year.   A good year seems like a big reach.  Just a year where we're not losing so many things, not so much breakage, stress, worry & free falling.  It felt like I could never get my footing last year.  I'd just get to a bit more solid ground & it'd crumble.  

I don't think I can handle another year of that.  2023 left me exhausted.  I felt angry, scared & hurt.  The problem for most of our issues last year is that none it was our doing.  We did all the things we were supposed to; made the appointments, checked the boxes, crossed & dotted.  None of it mattered.  Things kept breaking, being taken away, disappearing.  If 2024 just doesn't suck, that's a great improvement over 2023.

It's my blog's new year.  It's also the anniversary of my father passing a few years back.  The weirdest thing about that is, I've had to realize I was fine with  it from the start.  Its sad someone died, but the concept of my father had died decades before.  This was just a voice I occasionally heard on the phone.   I'm glad he had other people who were involved in his life & will miss him.  That's just not me.  May his next life bring him some solace.  He needed it.

Take care & may 2024 go well for you. Try to be kind.

Cya...

The Letter N...

The word Now is representing "N"today.  Now is an unusual word, in that it can be an adverb, adjective, noun or conjunction.  Regardless of it's use in sentence structure, the word denotes a point in time, the present.  That's hot right now.  We're going to the store now.  Now, why did you go & do that?

Now is the time we live in, not the future or the past.  We can not reside in either other state of time, but many of us try.  It's easy to get nostalgic & think of all those yesterdays.  However, those days are past & to focus on them is robbing you of living your life now.  Many of us worry about the future & what it may hold, but as the saying goes, que sera sera.  Whatever will be, will be.  We can make plans & prepare for the future, but if all our energy is focused on the then, we are wasting what we have in front of us now.

Living in the now should be easy, but it isn't for a lot of us, myself included.  When most everything you had is gone, it's easy to fixate when it was still there.  When $ is an issue, it's normal to worry about paying that next bill.  

As a + person, I have to accept that I do live in the now.  I can not go back to a time when I wasn't +.  Nor can I simply allow myself to focus on all the future might be's.  If I did, I'd drive myself nuts.  The Virgo in me wants to organize my life so when the future comes, it's less of a threat.  It seems that now can be a messy place & that nothing ever seems to come together as neatly as we want it to.  The past is filled with what-ifs & unfinished business.  The future is minefield of crisis & possibilities, good & bad. 

Now is the only place we live.  So remember the past, plan for the future but live for the now.  What other choice do you really have?

Cya