Not So Great...

 

For the last several years, I've felt off & not as well as I should.  It's never been a solid thing I could ID & there were always other more pressing issues.  I'd tried to get rest & get through it.   The last couple of years have been harder, but again there was a lot of stuff to handle.  Since September it's been a cascade of issues & appointments.  I really hoped by now, most of this crap would be off our plate, but it isn't.  

Spring is coming & that means seasonal issues; benefit renewals, storms, yard work, etc...  Everything else is still hanging on & not getting settled.  I'm doing my best.

SAD has been a real issue this year.  I was hoping it had passed for now, it hadn't.  For a while I've woke jolty several times during the night & almost every morning.  This is exhausting & takes so much from what little I had left just to get my morning started. 

I need things to stop, to be over, at least for a little while.  No more waiting, getting things fixed, piles of unknowns or difficult idiots.  I'm not fine & I'm not even sure what my best is anymore.  I'm spent & need to be done.

A lot of times, I wish I'd never made it into adulthood.  It had nothing to offer that I needed or wanted.  I wonder what if I'd died at a midnight showing of Rocky, spinning under a disco ball at the rink or even dancing under the lights at a club.  That would've been a good ending.  Instead I'll probably die in some disgustingly substandard, abysmally predictable hellhole. 

It's dark out & supposed to storm.  The upcoming week looks to be the same.  Here comes more SAD & cortisol.   Even if the sun did shine, it wouldn't matter, too much shit is still there & not going anywhere.  Being this tired, swamped by BS & dealing with this life is more than I can handle.   I don't need a refund or exchange, I just want it all gone.

There's my murky morning rant.

Cya...

Rainy Thursday After...

 

It's been raining since yesterday & shows little sign of heading out soon.   It's dark this morning.  Even with this rain, my allergies are still acting up.  We do need the rain, but not the storms or darkness.  

There won't be much happening today.  I have no interest in going out in this mess.  Bills have been mostly handled.   The rest hasn't show up yet.

My telemed appointment went alright.  It was a bit brief, but the new doctor didn't seem comfortable with the camera.  Now, I wait for them to set the next appointment.

That's all for now, take care.

Cya...

Cloudy Morning For Telemed...

 

It's dark this morning.  The upcoming may be stormy.  We need rain, but not storms.  It's making for bad sleeping weather.  It was muggy & unseasonably warm last night.

My telemedicine appointment is at 1 PM.  I need to get around, eat & get showered.  This should be a normal meeting to go over lab results.   

Other an errand or so, that should be it for that day.  Maybe I can get this done before any serious rain happens.  That's it for now, take care.

Cya...

More Busy Week Stuff....

 

The week is still busy.  We got some things done yesterday, but not everything went as we'd thought it would.  That's causing some workarounds to be thought out.    

It's time to handle bank runs & bills.  We both have appointments tomorrow.  All my labs finally made it to the specialist. 

I'll be happy when some issues get off our plate.  They've been lingering too long & there isn't much more we can do about them.  There's always more stuff to just waiting.

That's it for now, take care.

Cya...

Busy Monday...

 

It's the 1st of the month & the cycle begins again.  Besides normal things, there's an appointment today.  That means getting around a little earlier.  After shopping, we'll head out to handle that.

I'm trying to get a hold of my specialist & make sure all my labs arrived.  They're a pain to contact.  I have a telemed appointment Wednesday.

That's it for now, take care.

Cya...

Hello March 2026...

 

I didn't say goodbye to February, it was a particularly unpleasant month for us.  There was so much breakage, expense & stress.  That fails to mention all the inconvenient waiting.   That month is never easy on us, maybe next year can be a little less craptastic.

Hello March, surely you can do better.  It's a very low bar.   We both have appointments this month.  There's still some waiting going on.  Still, we've done what we can.

February barely made it's rainfall average, January didn't, we're at least 0.5" short.  I hope March can make up for it without flooding.  So far 2026 isn't getting a good review.

That's all for now, take care.

Cya...

Tree Groove...

 

Not much going on this morning, but I will say this, the trees are in the mood.  Tree pollen has been an issue for a while here.  Today was the 1st day the counts hit the high zone on pollen.com.  My eyes, nose & throat will be thankful when this calms down.  

That's about it for now.  Take care.

Cya...