Still Trying...

 

I'm still here & it feels like everything is trying it's best to push me over the edge.   A ton of little things, the weather, people's conditions, things needing handled, impending  storms that threaten our services, etc...  All of it eats at my resources.  What little I have.  Those people who say they enjoy getting older, must be leading very different lives than me.  My life was never easy, but every year, hell month, seems a lot harder.  It takes more to do less in almost every regard, from I can personally do to the cost of things.  Getting older was such a stupid idea.  

That's all for now, take care.

Cya...

It Came back...

 

I don't think anyone asked for it, but the heat came back.  The next week doesn't look pleasant. There isn't much going on here today.  From back to back points, my birth year failed to have a decent month.  

The last decent month we had was last year's August.  I had hoped for a repeat, no such luck.  From September to back it was hot, then sticky, then cold, then frigid, then dark, then stormy, then dark & steamy, then dreary & hot, now we're mostly just hot.  

My birth year went from point of suckage to another.  I don't have any hope this year will be better.  If there's a high point to getting older, it's eluded me.  Mostly it just sucks.

Cya...

Hello December & World AIDS Day....

 

  

It's the 1st of December & the end of the year.  It's a bright morning.  We have a bit to do today.  We have some errands & my roomie has an appointment.  It's also trash day.

I didn't see many articles this morning.  Most were talking about the rising cases of HIV during the pandemic.   Many were looking forward, some back, on the age of HIV.   Biden has stated his White House will  focus more on older Americans living with HIV.  The 50+ range is a large part of HIV+ people.

Hello December, let's try to be a good month.  No one needs  any end of the year drama.   We've dealt with that too many times already.

It's also World's AIDS Day.   This year's theme is equitable access to care.   Maybe  Biden will be more involved.  It'd  be easy considering what little tRump did.

Take care.

Cya...

Sorta Dreary...

I woke to a slightly overcast morning.  It's not bad, but it's not as shiny as things have been.  It's a sign, we're on the downward swing of the year.    There might be rain later.  

The older cat lost her last fang yesterday.  She's showing her age.  She's  somewhere around 14-15.  We're not sure exactly.  She was a mature cat, when we moved into the neighborhood.  The people who had her, left & didn't even bother to try to take her.  I really hope they rot.  So she's doing OK, but we'll have to keep an eye on her.

That's about it for now.

Cya...

Endings...

I know this is the season for thanks, but I'm sort of in a funk right now.   I don't mind Thanksgiving, it's about food.  Still, there are things going on that have left me a little odd.

I have been following a series on Netflix.  It's a British show & I'm only in season 8, but I know it ends at 11.  How very Spinal Tap of them.  It just got me to thinking.  What am I going to watch after that?  Will there be anything close enough to it or at least similar?  

I've got at least 24 more episodes & I'm already wondering what's going to happen once I finish this series that I've grown to like so much.  I feel the same way about the upcoming conclusion to the Hobbit trilogy.  

There seems to be so many endings in my life recently.  Things I've let go of.  Things that have ended or gone away.   That's just life.  But, I don't seem to be bringing in any thing new in to replace those exiting my life.  

Sure, this is just a TV show & a movie.  But, it's also something I share with my roomie.   Life keeps peeling back the layers & I'm not sure how much more it has to offer.  I almost don't want to watch the final episodes of my show or  see the last movie.  It's sort  of like telling myself, it never ended, the show just went on forever.  

Friendships, TV shows, animals all come with endings.  I don't like it, but they do.   When I was young & living with my mother, we moved about constantly.  I never got to finish anything or get too attached to stuff.   Sometimes, I wonder if that was the better way.

I'm tired of seeing things leave my life.  I'm not seeing many avenues of bring new things into it.  Most often, the only new things coming aren't things I ever wanted. Maybe I'm just getting older or too tired for any of this.  I don't know.  But, I do know I will love & hate the last moment of the Hobbit.  It will be the last time my roomie & I can set before the screen watching hobbits, elves, dwarves & others ride off into the credits.  

I guess I'm just tired of the mono no aware of life.

Cya...

DC Senior Talk...

I've blogged about the greying of the HIV before.  Many believe by 2015, over half the HIV + population will be 50 or older.   This article discusses a new tactic in Washington DC, that aims education & testing at seniors.  

According to this, seniors are far less apt to talk about STD's & if they do turn out to be +, they're diagnosed much later.  This late diagnosis increases their risks to already be suffering AIDS related illnesses & complications.  It also adds to the probability they've already further spread the virus.  

However, 1 in 5 of newly diagnosed HIV cases are people who are 50 & above.  These people have all the same risks as anyone else.  Many people, even other seniors, don't want to deal with the fact these people are still having sex.  Many of these people came from a generation when safe sex wasn't concept talked about to anyone other than sailors hitting risque ports of call.

I'm interested in how all this will pan out.

Cya...

+ & Gray...

Check out this site & article.  Both of these talk about the fact that by 2015 over 50% of people living with HIV will be over 50.  Over 50, damn in the 80's you were lucky if you had 50 days past diagnosis, let alone living until you were half a century old.   Maybe the 50 days thing was a bit of an exaggeration, but the other part wasn't.

Blood pressure, diabetes, cancer & a host of others await older people.  This oughta be a hoot for us who are + as well.  Just the thought of possibly having to take more meds for other ailments besides HIV is irritating.  Avoiding blood pressure meds is one of the reasons I'm exercising now.  Not that exercise will help much if I get cancer.  It might help avoid diabetes & strokes though, better circulation & less fat.

Man, it was a trip just getting used to dealing with HIV in my 30's.  Now the thought of being older & having more issues, well that's a little more trying.  At least I'm sorta used to the HIV.  Hopefully all this exercise can keep the other stuff at bay.  Who knows, maybe I'll be lucky & die from a massive lightning bolt while I'm sleeping.

Cya,,,