Bumps...

“Fasten your seatbelts, it’s going to be a bumpy ride,” is a quote the Gay community loves to throw about.  It's a slight misquote of Bette Davis from All About Eve.   It applies to a lot of things in Gay culture.  It's also pretty pertinent when dealing with anxiety.   I don't know why, but sometimes it feels like I'm in a race against something.  I have no idea why I'm racing, against who or what, not even why.  I just know I'm in a mad dash, pushing as hard as I can & I'm still falling behind.   I'm left feeling harried, frustrated & exhausted.  But mostly, I'm just trying to figure why I'm rushing & where's the finish line

I can usually handle this by trying to manage my life.  Not micro manage all the minutia, but at least have idea of what I'm doing that day.  Like what will we eat for the day?  Do we have any errands to run?  This usually works.

But as life would have it, something always have to screw it up & then the race is on again.   It doesn't have to be a big thing, it can be the smallest change or addition that throws you back on the track.   Even if you know it's nothing, suddenly everything's speeding again & there's an endless supply of potholes & bumps in the road.   All you can do is breath & push forward.

Cya...