Community...

 

Because of a mobile childhood & familial situation,  I was never good at the community thing.  I can be very social.  It's how I survived.  I thrived around bar folks & all the various acquaintances I had there.  At least before most of them dropped over from various issues like AIDS & OD'ing.  But for the most part these people & places were just diversions from everyday life.  Some of them were very nice & considerate people, but most were just background noise to get me through the moments.

Usually when I've had community in my life, it's been due to some conditions or qualities I shared with other people.  Being gay or being a college student, hell even being HIV+ isn't enough to form a community or real relationship with someone.

I guess the closest I got to a community was back when I was still actively gaming & going to Cons.  We shared more than a location, we had common interests.  Sometimes extremely opposing POVs, but on shared passions.  It was nice.  But time passed & people went separate ways.

Sharing a arbitrary trait, having the same illness, or having a trauma in common, may gives you grounds to meet & converse.  But, it's not enough to form a community or relationship.  I'd rather not have a community than be in a situation where the only commonality I have with others is my sexual orientation, disease, location, etc...   That would just wind up feeling desperate & fake.  Then I'd feel worse than before it all started.

I hope you find what you're looking for, but a community has to be about more than being Gay, HIV+, trans, or some other arbitrary quality you happen to share with others.

Take care.

Cya...