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Thursday, January 5, 2012

The Letter B...




Today's blog post is brought to you by the letter "B".  There are many great "B" words like; beloved, beautiful or bravo.  We are going to deal with a word that a lot + people encounter & it isn't a good one, "Blame".

To blame simply means to place fault or responsibility for some action or event onto someone or something.  People blame others for actions they perceive as negative.  People sometimes blame themselves in  some overly dramatic attempt to distract from a situation or to get pity.  

I choose a fiery "B", because red & fire are often associated with bad or even sinful behavior.  Consider the Scarlet Letter for instance.   I'm sure those people would've loved to have figured out a way to make that "A" flaming.  

There's often a lot of blaming when someone discovers that they're +.   They blame  themselves for being careless or stupid.  They blame the other party for not being more forthcoming.  The + person is blamed for just about everything by the people in their lives.  Society blames them for being + even if they were born with the virus.  Sins of the father & all that crap.    They blame the person who's cheating spouse infected them.

There is only one thing to be said about "blame", no good can ever come from it.  I could go on about the negativity of people who continuously blame others for everything under the sun. But I won't.   Blaming isn't the same as actually taking responsibility for the matter.  

I could blame a variety of different people or circumstances for me being +.  But the fact is, I had allegedly "safe" sex fairly often & eventually the roll of the die turned against me.  I am +.  The actions I took led to me being +.  Placing blame for the matter wouldn't have helped me & it wouldn't have allowed me to move on with my life.  

When you find out you're +, after the shock & all the stages of whatever process you may or may not go through.  You really only have one choice, accept it or don't.  Considering that not accepting it is really just an act of self delusion, accepting it is the only real option.   Turn & face the strange, face it head on & come to terms with it.  It won't be easy, but it will allow you to accept this new chapter of your story.  

No more blaming, no more mud-slinging, no self-hating or listening to others who wish to hate us for something that can not be undone.  Time to move out on the rest of our journey without the baggage, the anger or the guilt.  Good Journeys to us all.

Cya

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