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Saturday, April 30, 2011

Cut Grass & Storms...

I am very happy today that the people who cut our lawn, could finally get to it.  It was getting really high & seedy.  It took days for it to get to where they could mow it after the storms.  


Not that our yard looks anywhere near this good, (I am not yard proud) but it is far better than it was.  We are expecting more storms this weekend.  If they hadn't gotten to the yard today, they would've had to bring in the bailer & haul off the yard hay. 

Keeping the grass cut does more than make the yard look better, it also cuts down on the bugs.  Right after  the yard gets mowed, the birds swoop down on our yard picking up all the recently revealed insects & vermin.  No to mention, short grass is less inviting to rodents & therefore less interesting to snakes.

Keeping the grass cut down, helps with my allergies.  Once the grass goes to seed, it's much more of an irritant.  Anything that upsets my allergies, upsets my health & therefore my HIV issues.  I used to mow yards myself, but now I just don't have the energy most of the time.  In addition, I have always been somewhat allergic to cut grass, but once I was +, my allergies worsened drastically.

Here's to a fresh cut lawn.

I hope someone genuinely smiles at you today.


Friday, April 29, 2011

The Lull...



Today is a slow day.  I'm happy for that.  I had to go shopping & it was mostly an unremarkable trip.  Nothing was too good or bad.  I have no plans for today, except to try to recuperate from the hell this weather has wrecked on my body.  

The air is still thick from the storms & my every joint in my body wants to pop repeatedly.  A little stiffness is better than being sore all day.  For now my allergies are down & that lets me back off the allergy pills for a while longer.

I know this is about as exciting as watching paint peel, but after the last couple of weeks, having relatively little going on is totally OK by me.   The cats are lounging, my roomie is back in her routine & I can just do my own thing.  Hopefully the next wave of bad weather won't be so intense.

I'll just set back & do a little surfing, listen to some music & catch up on some TV episodes I've missed.  It is a nothing type of day.  Later I may catch up on some housework, then again maybe not.

I hope you can enjoy a nothing day soon.


Thursday, April 28, 2011

Thankful...

Over the past two weeks there have been a lot of crappy things happening in my area & my life.  We were at the beginning of the tornado/storm hell that ravaged a lot of the southern &  eastern states.



If this map included the previous two weeks you'd see a lot of dots in Oklahoma, Louisiana & Texas.  Not to mention a lot more in the states close to those three.  

I'm not going to talk about the storms though.  I am fortunate in that most of the major damage missed my area & most of the damage in my area, missed my home.  Albeit, it was a trying time, we made it through & will fix whatever was broken, sooner or later.

But today I am thankful.

  • I am thankful that the place I reside in was not seriously harmed.  It only got some damage to the rain gutters.
  • I am happy all the outside animals I feed were unharmed.
  • I am thankful that for now the storms have blown over.
  • I am thankful because we have the resources to deal with what little issues the storm caused us.
  • I am thankful for Oklahoma for one thing, if for no other reason, Okie's know how to deal with & predict storms.  Much of the weather technology was developed in Oklahoma.
Those are some things I'm thankful for, what about you?

Hope you have blue skies today.

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

HIV & The Town I Live In...

It took me a little while to get to this post.  I wanted to be more certain on a few things before I wrote it.  I am aware of a few things concerning HIV & this town.

  1. There are no support groups for someone who is HIV+, even though there is a high rate of transmission in the surrounding area.
  2. I live in a border town & across the border in Ft. Smith, AR there are more treatment options & support measures.  I qualify for none of these because I live in Oklahoma.
  3. There are no doctors who specialize in HIV in my area.
  4. It would be difficult to get my medications from the pharmacies in my local area.
  5. If I had not already been on disability & was still working, I have no doubt in my mind that once my HIV status became known that I would've been creatively terminated.
  6. I know that there are tons of churches in my area, but no RAIN (Regional AIDS Interfaith Network).
  7. I know that most + people in my area probably feel they have to hide their status for fear or reprisal by families, employers or just the locals in general.
  8. I know that the majority of people here operate with an extremely biased, outdated & religiously blind knowledge base concerning HIV & those who are +.
  9. I know that many of the local people who should be educating on the matters of HIV, STD's & sex actively obstructing any real discussion on the matters.
  10. I know that when the internet went out for two days, I felt as if I might as well have been living on the top of Mount Everest.   My outlet to the world was gone & I was isolated. 

Everything on that list sucked.  Before anyone says, hey just move, I would if it were feasible.  Thanks to the economy, I'm pretty much stuck where I am. Not to mention, it's incredibly unlikely that I'll  ever be able to leave Oklahoma.  If I did, I'd be on a waiting list for my meds from whatever program that state had.  I can't afford to go without my meds, so moving out of the state is not an option. 

I'm not meaning to whine, but I think it is important to note that I have explored the resources in my area.  There just aren't many, if any.  I hope things are better where ever you may be.

Try to have a good night everyone.

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Isolated...


When you're + or have a chronic illness, you often find yourself feeling alone.  Many of us, found that a lot of people we thought were in our corners when we got sick are now nowhere to be found.  Being ill, limits you, your abilities, your choices & the people who will be in your life.

If you've been ill for long, you try to develop means of coping with these lessened options & the isolation.  One of the most obvious is the internet.  I use the internet to communicate, shop, research, blog & just occupy my time.  It keeps me feeling more connected & part of things.  Sometimes we forget these things we depend on can disappear. 

On Sunday my internet went out....


My roomie & I were aggravated to say the least.  We called our provider (Suddenlink Sucks) & were told there was an outage.    Funny, I think we already knew that before we called, but they had no idea how long it  would take to fix.  We considered going out, but my area (SE OK) was virtually underwater from storms & flooding, so that was out.  The cable was freaking out as well, so we were virtually cut off for almost 2 days.  

That sucked!  There was nothing we could do about the situation.  If we had needed anything it would've been difficult since many of the roads in our area were flooded.  I'm not even sure that we could've gotten to the hospital, if we had gotten ill.  The roads in my area suck & there are a lot of low-water bridges, what a stupid concept.

Being ill & isolated is beyond frustrating, it can be outright scary.  The what-if's set in on you.  What-if this or that happens, what will I do?  The stress from all of this is bad on you & only feeds into the bad situation you're already in.  

I don't really have a good thing to point out in this post.  I am happy, my net is back, but still it reminded me of how fragile my little part of the world really is & again that sucks!

I hope life is treating you better where ever you are today.

Monday, April 25, 2011

Bad Weather & Aches

The crap-fest weather has remained & so have my aches.  Being + makes life so fun sometimes.  Besides the aches & annoyances, though is all the seriousness of foul weather in Oklahoma.  I think tornadoes were born here.  Tornadoes are nasty things with wicked senses of humor & are blazing decor critics.  They hate trailers & pink flamingos.

The winds picked up & the rain dropped by the ton loads.  The estimates for the rain here are between 2.5 - 4" in a very short period of time.  It caused the back rain gutter to come loose, great something else to fix.  But, we are better off than a lot people around here.  There are people who's homes are flooded, cars stranded in high water & may or may not places to stay during this mess.  



My point today, no matter how much I may gripe to the contrary, is there is almost always someone out there far worse off than yourself.  All in all, a detached gutter is nothing compared to a flooded home.  I have a house that is relatively warm & dry.  

I hope you are well & that the skies above you are, or soon will be, clear.



Sunday, April 24, 2011

Rainy Easter


If you're a kid then the weather today sucked.  Its raining on Easter.  But so it goes in April in Oklahoma.



I've talked about Easter quite a bit already.  So, I'll opt for other things instead that still sort of related to the holiday.  First off with a musical.




Then will try something for the kids.



This is a bit adult.




In other words...


Saturday, April 23, 2011

Blessed Be The Hunt...May It be Grand & Glorious..

Typically, when we think of hunts, huntsmen & those who would bless them, we don't think of children, Easter eggs & Catholic priests.  Most would probably think of Artemis or the Master of the Wild Hunt.  Not at this time of the year though.  This is Easter Saturday, so break out those baskets, get set, get blessed & hunt those eggs.


This is a traditional Easter Basket.


It's a little different than what we think of these days, but each item has relevance to Swieconka.  It's a Polish Easter tradition, each piece is symbolic.  Like the Pisanka, a traditionally decorated Easter egg.



These were days of tradition where each piece was iconic, relevant & time consuming.   These pieces took dedication & craftsmanship.  They are beautiful eggs.  It must have been a very different Easter than what most of us in the USA grew up with today.



This is probably more like what most of us are used to in this society.  Candy, fake grass & a store bought basket.  It is colorful & tasty, but it seems to be a bit lacking when compared to the previous basket & the pisanka. It seems everything that once held serious relevance & possibly religious importance, has been dumbed down for the masses to consume in this capitalist world.

Don't get me wrong, I may appreciate the beauty & ideals behind the more traditional basket & eggs, but there is no way I'm going through the effort of making pisanka for children.  From a Pagan Holiday to a Christian Affair to a capitalist festival of sales, Easter has changed.  

No matter what your take on this holiday, I wish you a good one.  May your baskets be full, your hunt go well & your bunny not be hollow or stuffed with marshmallow.



Friday, April 22, 2011

Sorta Good Friday...

I'm not the religious type, but this is "Good Friday".  I'm not sure just how good of a day it is, let alone how good a Friday it is.  However, I will try to list ten things that are good about today.

  1. I'm not in an alarming amount of pain, just slight achiness brought on by the weather.
  2. My intestinal system has yet to declare war on me today.
  3. The tree that got blown down by the storm is in a neighbor's yard, not mine.
  4. The cats have yet to destroy anything today.
  5. The never ending wind hasn't blown in any airborne simians or falling houses.
  6. Walmart was not a total hell today.
  7. The house & cars are in relatively good working order.
  8. The pollen levels in my area are at a moderate level & a not OMFG!!! level.
  9. My paperwork seems to have been approved from Human Services.
  10. I don't have to anything else today that I don't want to.

There is my list of "good" things for this Friday.  Hope you're having a great Friday.

I just can't resist the urge to be slightly perverse...



Thursday, April 21, 2011

Weather Shift

It had been warm, if not wet, around here for a bit.  Today on the other is fairly brisk & wet. I've mentioned numerous times about the weather & my health issues.  It's bad enough what the weather can do to me, but sudden shifts are downright nasty for me.

I know it's not that cold, but after getting used to 80's F & then having it drop back into the 50's F while also being wet is just too big a change for my sake.  It looks like we're going to be wet all through Easter, poor little children out hunting their eggs.  I don't celebrate Easter anymore, other than to de-ear the occasional chocolate bunny.  I used to love dying eggs as a kid. 

Easter like most holidays isn't much of anything for me anymore than a reminder.  It takes me back to what it was like for me as a kid & now I know what it should've been.   Holidays for people from bad families are always a weird & usually touchy subject.

Here I am taking somewhat perverse pleasure at the thought of children having their egg hunts ruined. But also dealing with the fact that I hate how this weather makes me feel.

Hope you are having a good day wherever you are.


Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Kudos To Roomie...

My roomie is considering some major changes in her life in the upcoming couple of years.  She is considering some major alterations regarding her health & her career situation.   It started off easy enough  with her just talking about the matters.  Due to input from others & myself she decided it was a good thing to start researching the matters.

Quite frankly, I think she was a bit blown away by the information she found. Not only the content of what she found, but by the volume. Both the matters she is considering are significant & life altering.  Both of us are Virgos to some extent, research & organization are fairly easy for us & highly desired in our lives. The research revealed things neither of us had even considered being factors.  

She knows the process she is about to undergo is going to be lengthy, embarrassing & painful.  It is going to be one of the most difficult things she'e ever taken on in her life.  However, she knows that she wants this & that she has, or is gaining, the tools to deal with the situation.  This trial ahead is going to require dedication.  It will require communication & honesty with herself & those who can help her through it.  

I'm fairly proud of her for even considering these options.  Five years ago, I don't think she would have.  The important thing here for me is to remember that although this will affect my life, it isn't about me or anyone else, other than my roomie.  I can give her my support & assist as I can can, but I can't do it for her.

I'm confidant she will get as much as the information as she can before she heads down this rabbit hole.  She knows that she can't rush into or through this situation.   She also knows that she's the only one who can do this for her.  This type of behavior is impressive, especially from a person trying very hard to realistically face an incredibly daunting task.  My roomie has accepted that this quest has to be about her & her alone.

Sometimes that sucks.  That alone thing, but sometimes it's nice to know you did something all on your own.  That isn't saying that I won't help wherever I can, but it is to say, that I, nor anyone else, can do it for her.  For realizing these things, I know she is much more mature than she was five years ago.  For being wise enough to not only look before she leapt, but to start doing a boat-load of research on the matter is smart & note worthy.  For being responsible enough to see it as not a necessary thing to do in her life, but also as one that will bring many positive possibilities is astounding.  

I am glad she has begun this epic quest of hers. It shows that she is being realistic about her life.  That she is choosing the right thing for herself & not the easy, expected one.  I'm happy that she has the faith in herself & her abilities to even consider this undertaking.  I very pleased with her for using her wits & intelligence in the matter & not just stupidly jumping willie-nille, totally oblivious to seriousness of the endeavor ahead of her. I do hate stupid people.



Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Not Much To Say Again...

It looks & feels like we are headed into a week's worth of crappy weather; thunderstorms, hail & tornadoes.  Oh Yippee!  My body feels like hell & feet are already hurting.  My roomie isn't fairing any better.  The cats all look at us like we purposely caused this weather.

Probably not going to blogging much until this over, but I will try to get out at least a little each day.

So I'll give you something newish...




The official video is supposed to released over Easter.  How apropos.   Do you hate it? Love it? Just not give a damn?  Can you give a actual critique without going all knee-jerky & religious?

Have fun.  Hope your weather stays pleasant. 

Monday, April 18, 2011

Opinionated...



Not going to be a long post today, just something to bounce an idea off the reader.  My roomie brought the idea that some people are just too opinionated. By that she meant that when someone makes a statement that we are not obligated to stick in our two ¢ on the matter.

The example she used that when a person comes up & informs another that their child has just died in the war, this person wasn't inquiring the second for an opinion.  Neither was it an appropriate place for the second person to interject their beliefs.  This was a time for support, compassion & if the second couldn't muster anything else, silence.

Communication is more than talking & hearing.  It is about genuinely trying to get a point across. Talking is not the same as speaking.  Some people gab all day & in the end say very little, so they just rambled on without communicating.  Others nod their heads & say that they heard you, but they didn't really listen.  They didn't take the time to comprehend what was being said.  

In a world where communication has become more & more indirect & impersonal truly conversing is often difficult.  Texting is not the same as communicating. Neither are one line blips on Facebook or Twitter.  Simply expressing your opinion without really listening to what was being said in the first place isn't communicating.  Constantly expressing your side of things is unyielding & rude.

Are giving your opinion to often?  Can you hold back your 2 ¢?  Or do you feel obligated to spit out your unrequested opinion?



Sunday, April 17, 2011

Left To my Own Devices...



My roomie & I watch a variety of shows that address people & their coping devices.  There are those exercise, shop, do drugs or a variety of other things.  Coping is a means by which we deal with stress.  Our lives are filled with stressors.  Not all sources are stress are bad for us, some can motivate to do things in our lives.  However, some are either difficult to deal with or beyond our control.  So we develop coping mechanisms.

Coping mechanisms can come in many forms; action, emotional & harmful, but all can be detrimental to our lives.  Action based mechanisms can be that I'm stressed at home so I'll spend more time at work or go shopping.  Many people refer to these as defense mechanisms.  The emotional forms can lead us into daydreams, wishful thing or our happy place.  Harmful ones can be drugs, cutting or reckless behavior.  No matter how benign the mechanism, if over used it can be more harmful than beneficial.


Too much stress is a bad thing.  It is especially harmful to those who already have compromised conditions such as being +.  People blithely tell you, "You have to avoid getting too stressed."  Like everyone doesn't already know that.  What they leave out is, how to accomplish the goal of not getting stressed out.

When my roomie & me used to have better resources, we would drive around for hours.  It's something I grew up doing.  It let  you clear your head & be anywhere else.  Used to, having a car meant freedom, now it just means that it costs a lot of $$$.  We also used to go see a couple of movies a week & stop to get something to eat while we were out.  We'd take a weekend & go to Tulsa.  We'd rent a hotel room, go to clubs, see a movie, go shopping, etc... 

Now, most of that is gone.  We can't afford to drive around aimlessly.   For the most part, movies have become expensive crap-fests.  It would take almost four times as much $ to do a weekend trip to Tulsa now, then it did ten years ago.   There goes most of our destressors.

I used to read avidly, but since I've been +, I can barely focus on anything.  My roomie & both have this affliction when it comes to many things like reading or watching movies.  Between the economy & our illnesses our means of coping with stress have been severely challenged.


We do our best to avoid stress, but that doesn't always work.  We're having plumbing problems again  & that isn't fun. There are always $ & health issues.  So what to do?  Do we hoard like those people on TV?  No, those people freak me out.  Just watching those shows is stressful.  Do we get into drugs?  No, have $ issues already, remember?  So what do we do?  The answer is right now I don't entirely know.

All I can tell you is that I have to take things bit by bit.  Break down the big problem into to smaller, more manageable pieces.  I try to use the backpack philosophy, that I've mentioned before from Up In The Air.  The best I can do is to let go of most of the crappy things, situations & people as I can.  I have to try to eliminate those things that drive me bonkers.


How do you cope with stress?  Are your coping devices actually helping you or holding you back?  Can you still afford the stress mechanisms that used to help you?  I hope you have the tools to deal with the stress in your life.  May your days be stress-free.  As for me, well as usual I'm left to my own devices...


Saturday, April 16, 2011

Blame Games & Accidents




Growing up, my brothers & me often found ourselves to the target of someone's pointed finger of blame.  I admit with our mother & her other interests (alcohol) we were often left to our own devices & got into a lot of hell.  But, no where near what we got blamed for.  There wasn't time enough in 3 days to do what we got blamed for in a 24 hour period.


Then there were the genuine accidents.  They were no better.  With a drunk for a parent, you might as well have thrown the plate at the wall on purpose, as to having it slip through your slippery dish-soap covered fingers.  Kids in this environment learn quickly to distance themselves from anything problematic that might get them blamed.  These children know that no one will ever believe that they didn't do it, let alone they didn't do it with malicious intent.



We grow up avoiding situations where we could be blamed for anything.  We cringe when something goes wrong or gets broken, even if we didn't have anything to do with it.  We don't believe that any one will ever see that we are innocent of the accusation.  Or, if we did have something to do with it, that it was an accident. 



We learn that it is best to do whatever is necessary to avoid the blame.   We misdirect, target others & sometimes even deny or lie about the situation.  People say they don't like others who try to avoid accountability.  However, those people sure seem to enjoy passing that blame onto others who had nothing, or as least nothing deliberately,  to with the situation for which they are being blamed.


Yesterday my roomie took a trip & fell against the door near the hot water heater. She was embarrassed & a little bruised.  Later I noticed there was a small leak on top of the water heater. It had been jolted when she bumped into it earlier.   I wasn't too happy, but not at her.  She was raised the same way I was & most likely on the edge of panic due to fear for being blamed.  Yes, she fell into the water heater, but it wasn't on purpose. It wasn't her fault she fell & it wasn't her fault that the stupid water heater is in a ridiculous place with a door opening right up onto it.  But still she feared the blame & the resentment that would've come from this situation if I had been some other person in her life.



Yes, I was upset, but at the idea of how is this going to get fixed.  The Virgo wanted details & price quotes.  I was pissed at this old house for breaking down once again .  I was angry at yet another surprise & I've told you Virgos do not like surprises.  In the end, it did happen & the only the thing to do is deal with it & move on with our lives.  That's all you can do when crap happens in your life.  It happens, you freak out a little, you make a plan/decision & you move on to the next thing.

Hopefully your life is being as boringly pleasant as it can be at this very moment.  Enjoy the nothing moments.


Friday, April 15, 2011

Dark Skies



Last night we had some serious storms in our area.  I've grown up around thunder storms & tornadoes & accept them as part of life.  There is a storm cellar on the property but I've never used it & didn't last night.  I am of the mind, that if a tornado is going to get you, it's going to get you.  That probably sounds a bit cavalier to some, but not to me.  Most cellars are barely 6 feet in the ground & the tops of them are usually above ground.  If a tornado comes near, it can dig through that little bit of dirt.  



My roomie's sister-in-law is also an Okie & one would think she could handle a storm, but that is not the case.  So my roomie's brother, his wife, two kids & a friends of theirs ducked down into the dark, wet pit called the cellar.  There storm warnings lasted quite some time & during which there was a pause in the storm activity.  They scurried up out of the hole to go to the bathroom & get a drink, before returning back down to the recesses of the earth.  They reminded me of those crabs that live on the beach & have to get all their scavenging done before the tide returns.  Then again it was sort of like some form of undead rising from it's crypt, seeking sustenance & then return to the depths from which it came.

Storm cellars are nasty places.  They are often ankle-deep in water, have vermins & snakes.


All in all, unless I see the funnel of the tornado, there is little chance of me going down into a storm cellar.  I hope all of you are fairing well & don't find  yourselves in need of a storm shelter.

Thursday, April 14, 2011

The Sweet Bliss Of Sleep

I felt really off yesterday & it wore me out.  I crashed fairly early & fell straight to sleep.  I woke up & for the first time in a while I wasn't achy or feeling groggy.  Sleep is the most important thing to anyone's health.  If  you aren't sleeping well, then you won't feel well.

Most people live with a fairly notable level of sleep debt or deprivation.  This comes about for many reasons.  You could have a sleep disorder.  You could not try to get enough sleep.  You may actually need more sleep than most people.  There are tons of reasons, but whatever the reason, sleep debt is dangerous to your health in the long run as well as the short term.

Lack of sleep can cause a host a health ailments; diabetes, weight gain, memory loss &  microsleeps. Those are just the physical ailments, it can also lead to depressions, irritability & hallucinations. These can all shorten your lifespan. However, one blackout while you're driving & it could all be over for you, as well as others.

Sleep is a mysterious function of the body that we still don't totally understand.  What do know, is that we need sleep & a fair amount of it daily.  It helps get recharge & heal our bodies.  Sleep is when the body can do much of its custodial services if you will.

If you have an illness that affects your sleep, then you need to deal with problem right away.  Because it will become a vicious cycle or the illness affecting your sleep, then your lack of sleep affecting your illness, only to begin again.  There are things that can be done about sleeplessness, but first you need to determine what it is causing yours.

If you have problems sleeping, you have a medical problem & should treat as such. After a good night's sleep I am rejuvenated & feel fairly well.  I hope you sleep well & I wish you sweet dreams for tonight.

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Ankles, Feet & Toes Oh My...

The weather keeps changing from warm to chilly, dry to humid, but the wind remains fairly constant.  Today hasn't been as windy as the previous days, but it's supposed to blow in more storms this week.  Weather can be a pain in the ass for someone who is +.  The meds can already cause sore joints & other ailments, then Mother Nature has to take her whack at it.

Besides the intestinal ailments the meds can cause they can be aggravated by atmospheric & environmental factors.  I've mentioned before that allergies can upset the whole matter. Many meds can make you extremely photosensitive.  This leaves in need of SPF & a lot of shade.  Excess heat is usually no more welcome than bright light when you're on HIV meds.  Heat & light can sap your strength & leave with a migraine.

Today's issue is the fluctuation of the humidity & temperature.  I wake in the morning & fully well expect my body to creak like an old wood floor. The creakiness usually passes fairly quickly & is nothing an ibuprofen can't handle.  But the stiffness in the joints & muscles can sometimes take a lot longer to get past.  I have to watch how I sleep now.  If I sleep with my arms or legs in the wrong position, I'll pay for it the next day.  My ankle is achy & feels like it's been bound to tight to walk on comfortably.  It's probably a combination of the weather & how I slept.  It won't get any better until I sleep again, so I'll just have to hobble around today.

It's better than when the gout kicks in. An ugly issue with an ugly name.  The commercials for the medicine that treats gout make the ailment sound manageable.  If you ever have a flare-up of gout, which hope you never do, you will think it is anything but manageable.  You've probably heard all those stories about animals getting caught in traps & chewing their feet off.  My theory is that those animals had gout & thought the trap would chop off their painful foot.  

One of the problems with HIV & similar conditions is that they rarely travel alone.  Most often they bring company to the party.  HIV has no problem letting the environment rattle you, weakening your immunity so some other virus can bug you or allowing an ailment like gout to set in to cause further ridicule & suffering.  

My hope for you today is good or at least tolerable weather.

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Huffington

Saw an article on Huffington Post today.  It was talking about whether or not teachers should be banned from using social networking sites like Facebook.  Apparently the teachers are getting together & talking about all those little beasties they have to deal with all day.  This also came up on Soda head & I responded:

No, they shouldn't be banned.  If they're found to be making libelous/slanderous statements then they can be sued.  If not the 1st Amendment applies to them as well as anyone's kids.  If you're kids are bratty & being talked, then it's their own doing. If parents don't like it, then they can do something to corral their kids.  When I was in school I was perfectly aware of which teachers liked me & which didn't, this just makes it a little more clear.  Teachers are allowed to voice their opinions & are not required to like every little "angel" that goes through their classroom.
It's amazing in this country of "freedom", when something comes along we don't like, how quick we are to want to censor, edit or outright ban it.  How very Unamerican, but typical, so maybe it is American.

We have taken so much away from teachers as it is, why not take a little bit more.  We have edited how & what they teach.  We have told them to teach to the test.  We barely pay them in most states, yet some political pundits act teachers are gold-diggers.   Their retirements & unions have been threatened.  My only ? is, why in the world would anyone want to be a teacher?

Teachers, Police Officers, Firefighters & other municipal workers are usually employed by the city/county & tend to be severely underpaid. Can you can imagine being a police officer in NYC trying to survive on 60K?  A city where a 90 square foot apartment can rent for $750.  Just imagine if he/she has kids.  Rent alone for a 250 square foot, one bedroom apartment could easily eat up $18,000. Add to that #200 - $500 in utilities.  Then there goes over a third of their salary.  That doesn't include anything like taxes, insurance or transportation.  Oh & by the way, that 60K is for an officer who's been at the job a while, starting pay is much lower.

Back to the point, teachers should not be banished from social networking sites, just because they talk about your kids.  Nor should they be fired because of talking about your kids or for just otherwise being human.  Teachers are not & are not required to be saints.  They can talk about people.  They can have a beer.  They can be real people with lives outside of teaching society's little monsters.

As for you with little monsters, most cities have leash laws.

.

Monday, April 11, 2011

Sodahead ?

I go to Sodahead.com & answer ?'s from time to time & today's ? for me was, "Should Match.com screen for criminals?"  My answer:
 An adult person's safety is first & foremost their own responsibility. What makes a criminal? Is it that they've had a speeding ticket? They pissed in a college fountain? They shop-lifted? They got busted with a public intoxication citation? Or are we talking about violent offenses? Then are we talking about all violent offences or will we limit it too things like domestic battery & sexual assault, while leaving out barroom brawls? There are a lot of factors to be addressed before an online dating service can be held responsible for screening its applicants' criminal histories. Would you like to have their credit checked as well? To end this, there are a ton of sites online that will do background searches. If a person is in a position to be concerned about someone else's background (like dating a total stranger they met through Match.com), then they might want to do a background search & find out for themselves. That is if they can get a real name out of the person they're trying to hook up with.
I truly believe safety is mostly a personal  issue.   It pisses me off that an adult has to wear a seat-belt or a helmet on a motorcycle.  If they get killed it was their own doing & to hell with the do-gooders trying to save them.  It's called Darwinism.  All these do-gooders are really concerned about are themselves any way.  What will I do if so & so dies because he wasn't wearing a seatbelt?  Damn Nags.

Again I ask whose definition of criminal shall we use?  I bet the majority of us all have had at least one run in with the law.  If all of those people who have had run-ins couldn't be on match.com, then who would be left?  A few boring, plain vanillia, socially defunct people who have never had any fun in their lives.  Yeah, that sounds like a fun date.

As for the background search, I normally oppose these things, but then again I oppose meeting people to date online as well.  Call me old-fashioned (HA!), but I think you should get to know people face to face, most likely at their place after your first bout of sex.  Hey, it may've been closing time, but that didn't mean you had to go home, at least not your home.  Background searches have their place, like for employers & I guess nowadays for people who use online dating services.

Match.com shouldn't be held responsible for your safety or screening for criminals.  Then again Match.com shouldn't be used for dating, thats what bars, churches, street corners & Craigs List are for, silly.

Sunday, April 10, 2011

BSOD & Rapid Fire Restarts


Not a long one today.  A little worn out.  My roomie's computer is being a super King Kamehameha bitch.   Move over Kyle's mom.   It keeps throwing up errors, restarting & of the BSOD can't be left out.  We went out today to price a small notebook for her while we have hers fixed, if  we can't fix it ourselves.  Hit Walmart, Best Buy & Sears.  Was too tired to hit anything else & it turns out Sears only carries computers online these days.  After that, we at least got Chinese food.   OK, it was mall Chinese, but that's better than what I can get at home.  

The search is still on & the Chinese was good, but still the computer is being bothersome.  My roomie calls her computer Saffy, after Saffron Monsoon.  I think I'm going to start calling it Kyle's Mom.



Saturday, April 9, 2011

Meds & Interactions...



I, like many people, especially those who are +, have to take a handful of meds throughout the day.  I do use some herbal supplements & vitamins.  My Dr. recommended a multi-vitamin & B complex.  I take cinnamon for help with aches & sugar.  I tried a combo omega fatty pill & it left me on the toilet way too often.  When my system settles down, I may try a different omega, but not right now.  



There are many great supplements out there, but there a lot that can be dangerous, especially if you're already on other meds.  St. John's Wort & garlic are two I have to avoid, because they can both alter how my meds work. I came across a blog entry today on the merits of ginger for inflammation & pain.  My roomie has deal with a fair amount of both, so I read the article thoroughly.  It sounded great, until I went & researched the supplement & found out about some of its qualities & possible interactions.  The main one is that ginger can interact with many drugs to cause thinning of the blood & a reduction of coagulation.  This would not be a good thing for people on meds or supplements that can already do that.  You could literally bleed out.



If you are considering taking a supplement, then educate yourself on the attributes of the substance in question.  What will it do?  What can it do?  Does it interact with any of my meds?  Start by reading the label thoroughly.  Then google it & research everything you can about it, there are a ton of places that will help you with that.  Talk to your Dr. about anything you're taking & I do mean anything.  Most importantly develop a good relationship with your pharmacist.



Your pharmacist can help you navigate through all the ?'s you might have about your meds & how they might interact with other substances including other meds, herbs or even foods.  Your meds & your health are your responsibility.  DO NOT depend on anyone else to get this information for you.  Your Dr. might not think to tell you or just might not know.  You can only halfway believe what you read on the net.  Those little drug inserts require pharmacology degrees to understand.  So, do your due diligence, ask your Dr. ?'s & talk to your pharmacists.  This will help you have some idea about your meds & how you will respond to them.

I hope this day finds you all as healthy as possible.

Friday, April 8, 2011

Concepts-A-Go-Go

Yet again I stumbled today & it was a trip.  I went to this page & it'd been a blast if I still got lit.  Then it sort of spun my my mind into thinking about Ikebana, the Japanese art of flower arranging.  I'm normally not all that into floral arrangements, but the Ikebana pieces are true art, in practice & meaning.  In this art every aspect is deliberate, intentional & important.   In fact, what isn't there is as important, if not more so, than what is.  They deal with negative space.  Maybe that's what dark matter really is, just negative space.

From light particles to flowers & dark matter I jumped into the conceptuality of my own thoughts in relation to these subjects & came back to a four points I occasionally return to;  Mono No Aware, Mottainai, Wabi-Sabi & Momento Mori.  


Mono No Aware is the understanding, acceptance & actual embracing of the idea that all things are passing & in that passing, the transience, they are beautiful.  It is now Spring & the warm winds of Summer are already blowing to chase Spring on its way, so the next season can begin.  Summer will be ushered out by autumn & then again the cycle will continue with Winter.  All are beautiful, all are temporary.  Fresh strawberries, summer wine, the scent of jasmine in the night air, those are all things to be relished, because soon they will be gone.



Mottainai regards a sense of concern over wasting things.  It is for some a sense of frugality with all things.  Waste not, want not... What a waste.  Reduce, Recycle, Reuse...   Are all ways of looking at this concept.  They are quite literal in some sense.  I also see it in reference to art, especially Ikebana, to use only what is needed to make the piece.  There is the fashion philosophy or getting full attired & then examining the outcome & deciding to remove one things to make the outfit stronger.  Less is more.


Wabi Sabi is the understanding & acceptance that things are imperfect, incomplete & temporary.  Like human beauty.  No one is ever prefect, if they were, someone would probably kill them for being so in the first place.  Our looks are never what we want them to be & they will fade over time.  Some of are fortunate enough to actually look better as they age, others had all the glory of youth.  Belle-Laide, is a French term for the beautiful ugly, sometimes it is said as une jolie-laide.  Noting someone's beauty is unusual.  There are many people who when talking, acting or performing are gorgeous, but when they are still or in a picture are not beautiful at all. 



Momento Mori is understanding your own mortality & that of all those around you.   There are entire genres of work in many art forms that focus on this concept.  To me, it is very much a live for the moment, for you will die idea.  We need to appreciate what is here now & remember that it's time & ours is short.  

So what do the lights, flowers & concepts have to do with me?  I am +, therefore everything.  The lights & all these things are fleeting as is our time on this world.  I can accept the negative in my live, by seeing that it accents the positive.  I can try not to waste the gift of time & resources that I have been given.  I can let myself allow others to be imperfect, flawed or even ugly & realize it doesn't diminish their worth or need for compassion.  That one can be the most difficult for a Virgo.  Finally, I have a daily reminder of my mortality, my meds & the knowledge that they aren't a cure, but only a treatment.

What are your fav concepts?  If you don't know, go wiki-ing & find out.  May your paradigms be sound, but never so rigid as to break in the face of change.



Thursday, April 7, 2011

Still Covering Things...

A slacker day & was hanging out & watching vid.  No snickers now, but the movie was Cat & Dogs: The Revenge of Kitty Galore.  It's a great name, if nothing else, the beginning sequence was straight out of a Bond film, including Shirley Bassey.    She's the reason why I'm back to the topic of covers.  She covered Pink's Get The Party Started.  




That was Pink's & this is Shirley Bassey's...



Quite a difference there.  I'm being lazy today & I'm just going to give you a few more to see what you think of the various covers of the same song.  Sometimes the person, instrument & intent can make all the difference in world.   These are from Zebrahead, Damien Rice & Lisa Hannigan & the Royal Gigolos.  From punk to bluesy to clubsy, have fun.  Try looking for covers of your favorite songs.  You might be surprised & find something you really like.









Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Cover Jobs...

I found a new-to-me place on the net today, jukesy.com  It's a site that lets you type in a song or type of music & starts loading videos from Youtube.com  that fit the description.   I typed in Pop Muzik  & it loaded several options.  The first of course was the original song from the 70's.




Then it went to 90's revamp from A Night At The Roxbury.  Then it started taking some unforeseen turns.  There was an odd rendition from U2 of all bands.  Of course, some rapper had to use the title & have absolutely nothing to do with the original song.  An English speaking J-band named eX-Girls did a screechy cover.  Jedward did some weird, teenish cover.   Fler did a scary, German rap thing unrelated to the original. Dub Spencer & Trance Hill did something sort of related to the original & then there were others again totally unrelated. 

Covers are a touchy subject for me.  I love a lot of covers, but I hate far more.  Covers should show respect to the original song.  They should be more than someone sampling a base line or a riff.  At the same time the cover should be made the singer/band's own.  It should have their impact on the song.  A complete copy of the original song is not a cover, it's a tribute.   There are places for tributes songs, albums & even bands, but they aren't covers, they're sound-a-likes.

Take Blue Monday by New Order.  Orgy's cover was good, but really not that different, just screamier.  The same goes for Fear Factory's cover of Gary Numan's Cars.  An example of a good cover is Prince's When You Were Mine as covered by Cyndi Lauper.  Then Tegan & Sara did what seemed like a tribute to Cyndi's version of the song.

Covers are like life.  We all have to deal with what were handed & most often what we find in front of us are hand-me-downs & stuff recycled a zillion different times.  You not only have to make it work, you have to make it yours.  So what if you now live in a house that's had four different owners, you can still make your home, showing your personality.  I guess the hardest part of this is knowing who you are & accepting the limitations of your materials; your clothes, yours music or your house.  Being original isn't about having everything brand new.  It's about making whatever it is, no matter how old, scream that it's yours.

Try to do one thing today that just screams YOU!

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Stumbled Upon...

I was Stumbling today & came across this photo.


It's a simple enough statement, but the impact is awe inspiring.  The humble realization that things can just be & not have to be something the giver demands acknowledgment or restitution for, is almost unknown of these days.  The idea of doing something for nothing is almost unamerican.  We are the ultimate capitalists after all.  Sure, some people out there doing volunteer work, but they've probably got an agenda, right?  They want to be seen doing good works or they're doing it to feel better about themselves, or even more common they're being forced by their parents, their schools or the courts.  Don't even get me started on those alleged do-gooders that go out & push their religious malarkey on others, like missionaries & street walking, door banging witnesses for whatever religion is doing a numbers drive this week.

But back to the pic.  There is this radical gift of light being given & no response or payment is even expected.  I realize that the Sun is a star & therefore allegedly without feeling or thought.  However, for many cultures the Sun was a deity & often held in the highest regard.  It might be nice if we could be like the Sun & let a little of the light in ours lives shine on others without expectation, judgement or intent.

Imagine if you could a world where people were humane just because & no other reason was needed.




I know the poet was Muslim, but that isn't what this is about.  This post is about the amazing impact of one small statement.  To do a bit of paraphrasing,  "The greatest form of anarchy is a random act of kindness."  I think Hafiz tuned in to this idea & wanted us all to to see it.  At least, that's how I choose to interpret this writing on the wall.  I hope someone does something kind for you today.

Monday, April 4, 2011

Feeling Creaky

Yesterday, it got almost to 90 F here & it was windy as hell.  Today we are going to be lucky to hit 60 F & will be down into the 30's tonight.  All the topsy turvy weather is hell on me.  I don't know if it would've been if I wasn't +, but it is now.  These ups & downs play havoc with my allergies & leave me feeling stiff & bit like the Tin Man needing oiled.



The winds blew hard yesterday & are still going today.  They're stirring up all the pollen, dust & debris.  My breathing is shot.  Went to Walmart to pick up a few things & by the time I got back out it was colder & my breathing was ragged.

I know I tend to hit back on a lot of the same topics but these are the things that are in my life.  More importantly, these are the things that affect my life on a frequent, if not daily basis.  When you are +, everything little is a trigger for something you used to blow off.  My allergies were never as bad before I was +.  Of course I'm also getting older, so it's hard to tell which one is the culprit.

I heard about the AIDS Olympics & I just laughed.  If I had the strength to do anything like that, I sure wouldn't be on disability.  Then again I might, I have no idea how I'd ever pay for my meds otherwise.  But really an AIDS Olympics?  People already think HIV is something you can live with easily & I, for one, tell you, that it isn't.  HIV isn't always, but can be serious hell.

Oh well enough of my rambling.  Maybe tomorrow the weather will improve & I'll feel better again.  Here's to good weather & no allergies.

Sunday, April 3, 2011

I Can't Believe It, A Big One



This actually pretty amazing.  I'm not the person with the most stick-to-it-ness, but I have kept posting for three whole months.  For me this is an accomplishment.  I can start habits, but many of them don't stick, but so far I am right on track with this blog thing.


I have had good habits in the past but many of them have gone the way of the dinosaurs for some reason or another.  Some I just forgot & let go.  Others were no longer needed.  For over a decade I carried an over the shoulder soft briefcase/book bag.  It was my life, I had everything in there; my books, my notes, pens, pop, cigarettes & a ton more.  Once school was over though, it didn't serve as much use & it found itself relegated to a closet.  It had once been my most consistent accessory, then it was no longer needed & left to gather dust.


Threes are weird.  College classes usually came in three hour blocks, if they didn't it just felt weird.  A five hour class seemed like torture & an one hour class somehow felt like cheating.  They say bad things come in three's, I wonder if those three were the only ones we noticed.  Most people spend at least part of their lives in a familial three; theirs, their parents & their grandparents generations.  Eventually the parents get replace by child's & grandchild's generation, but the three remains.


For a lot of folks, the three leads to some form of religious thing.  The Christian trinity or the Triple Faced Goddess.  I'm not really into any organized religion or form of spirituality, as I have said before, I'm mostly pantheistic.  I never really got the hang up on threes, it's mostly a Greek thing, with body, mind & soul.  I think at one point it was probably based on the phases of the moon; waxing, full, waning.  However, they left one out, the dark of the moon.  So this whole religious thing should be based on fours not threes. There should be the Maiden, the Mother, the Crone & the Warrior.  Catholicism almost has it with the Father, Son, Holy Ghost & Mary, the Co-Redeemer.


Threes complicate things.  It's hard enough to choose right or left, but then some smart-ass has to come along & give us another option, like up or down.  Threes are just a hint at the complexity of our lives. One child, one child's perspective.  Two children equals two perspectives.  However three can equal three perspectives, one unified front or worse a two child block leaving out the third child.  No matter what else you can say about the number, three is complicated.


The number three is also a symbol for folly & or cautionary warnings.  Take the men above, we call them the Stooges.  They are portrayed doing stupid things that usually bring them harm.   Then there are the morally superior monkeys that neither, see, hear or speak evil.  There were three Wyrd Sisters to tempt Macbeth. But threes can also be a sign of strength, even for the Stooges.  Take Donald Duck in The Three Caballeros.  Another example is The Three Musketeers.


Regardless of your interpretation of the number, today is the marking of my three month anniversary of writing this blog. That's 90 days, 90 entries that I have actually done.  If you find this pathetic, that's fine, go ahead & laugh, but you're laughing at my post & I did that.  I wrote the post that made you, so be thankful.  You might not find anything else to laugh at today. No matter how you react to this post, I hope it moves you in some way.  If nothing else there is the paraphrased proverb, "The longest journey begins with a single step."  Thank you Lao-tzu for that.

Today is my three month anniversary, happiness & hoo-rahs to me.  It's a very happy un-anniversary to me, to me.  I hope you have a great day & maybe finish some little thing that gives you sense of accomplishment.