Conversations Stopped...

I've talked a lot about being a person on the fringes, being marginalized for whatever reason.   Whether it's being gay, ethnic, female, trans, + or whatever, there's always some way in which the deck is stacked against you.    This hetero-normative world prefers things in their little pigeon holes & has White males at the top of the pyramid.   

It sucks & a lot of people get discriminated daily just on the basis of not being white, hetero male in this society.   Its a serious issue & should be talked about.  It should be addressed.   

But, we have to deal with the fact no amount of litigation or civil law is going to intrinsically change how people respond to us.   It isn't illegal for a racist person to be racist.  As long as he doesn't actively discriminate against you in some legally protected way, he's within his rights.  Not saying he's not an ass, but he's not breaking any laws.

Some of us in these fringe communities have gotten too sensitive to these others.   Some of us have fought so hard for so long, we just see everything as a slight.  Some want the fight just for the drama. 

Take the gay cake fiascoes that keep getting talked about in the news.  OK, I'm gay & if someone refused to handle my business I'd move on to the next baker.  No way, I'd try to force someone to handle my cake, they'd probably spit in it.  

I'd never go to that bakery again. I'd write every bad review I could.  But, I wouldn't take them to court,  If I was a baker, there'd be plenty of things I wouldn't want to put on my cakes.  I'd avoid politics, religion & racial things.  I wouldn't want to produce a hateful cake.  That'd be my bakery & my name.

Again, I am gay & if someone doesn't want to deal with me, it doesn't make it a gay issue.  They could just have a problem with me personally.  They may be in a bad place themselves.  Even if it was because I'm gay, so what?  Trying to force thing would most likely only worsen the issue.  

We, the marginalized, can become so jaded we're locked & loaded, ready for a fight.  We can see slights where there were no meant.  We can choose worthless battles over meaningful wars.   We need to choose our fights & hold back on cries of indignation until we're sure of the situation.  If not people will think we're just milking the issue.  Is that all we're doing?  Maybe some of us, just like the attention.

Cya...