People who've never been through trauma, no matter the kind, can't understand you aren't & can never be again the person you were before the event. It's impossible. You changed, you were altered by in a way that is irrevocable.
War, illness, accident, fire, abandonment, crime, injury etc... These events shove you from the place you were into somewhere new & then slam the door behind you. If you're lucky, a new door opens.
Sometimes, like with finding out you're HIV +, outside that door lies uncertainty, fear, hate, stigma. impossible odds... Sometimes there is a door, but you have to break it down. Others, there is no door at all & you have make your own.
Going from HIV - to +, becoming a victim of crime, being forced to fire a weapon at someone, losing your ability to have children, see, hear, etc... these things all permanently alter you. The events can't be undone. The marks are indelible.
If a door closes in your life. Try to stop for a while. Try to breathe. It won't be easy. You need to go through the next door, but maybe not right this moment. Hell, maybe not even this year or the next.
Cya...
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