3 Things...

I read about people going through unpleasant things in their lives.  Some people are gracious enough to get through those moments with little fanfare.  I wasn't 1 of those people.  Neither, did I take everything as the universe attacking my personal being.  I was somewhere in the middle.  

My roomie & I are going through our fair share of things now.  We're both on disability.  We're both getting older.   We both live in a hick-town with precious few resources.  I'm dealing with HIV & the idiocy of others.  My roomie is dealing her weight & medical issues of her own.  Going through this, I've had 3 things repeatedly reinforced.

1.  It doesn't matter who's too blame.  In the long run, simply accepting the fact the problem is at hand & must be dealt with is your best option.   The blame game with only aggravate, exhaust & isolate you.  It doesn't matter who I contracted HIV from.  The fact is I did & I am +.   Knowing who the virus originated from won't help me at all.  Maybe my roomie's family were causal in her eating habits as a youth.  So what?  It's her problem now & only she can deal with it.

2.  Why me?  This is a futile question.  Even if you get an answer you can accept, it won't change anything.  Why you?   Why not you?    I got HIV because I had sex.  It was "safe" sex, but apparently not safe enough.  1 of my roomie's current health issues is perimenopause.  Why her?  Well, as sucky as it may be, she's a woman, end of statement.  The choices are menopause or hysterectomy.  Even with the ladder, a woman can still have aspects of menopause.  The why me doesn't matter or help.

3.  Finally, the biggest lesson I've learned concerning these things is simple.  Things can always get worse.  Throughout my years as  a + person, I've seen people far worse off than I was due to HIV.  My roomie has had a bad go of it with her perimenopause, but she recently talked to someone who was much worse off.  These moments can put things in perspective.  You may have it bad, but it could be worse.

Don't worry about the blame or the why.  Accept whatever it is, is now part of your life.  Try to make as much peace with as it possible.   Until then, your situation probably won't improve any.   By all means, never ask, "How could it get any worse."  Life will show you how things can get worse.

Acceptance & perspective on these things is imperative.  Anything else is just a distraction & a thorn in your side.  Let it go.   Accept the new you & your new life.  Like it or not, the old 1 is gone.  

Cya...