Long Year So Far...

It's been a long, trying year so far.  Amazingly enough, neither the house nor cars were the source of the drama.  I haven't been my most healthy this year.  But that's nothing compared to what my roomie has gone through.

After a host of medical issues & surgeries, she's on the mend.  She still has to have follow ups, but so far that's all.  Still, understandably the emotional/psychological cost of these events have been taking their toll,

In this past year, she has undergone a lot of changes & events.  These health events have very trying, even for myself.   There have been a lot of unknowns & not so great possibilities.   As things seem to be settling down, the stress of the situation is starting to surface.

Whenever you go through a big event, especially something you had little or no choice in the matter, the situation can be overwhelming.  That emotional burden can come in waves long after the major action has taken place.  People often say, "OK, it happened, now it's time to get over it."  Some folks can, but a lot can't.   Telling someone to just get over it, is like telling them stop breathing.  They can't.   Things like cancer or other traumas scar us, they leave a permanent mark.   

I was diagnosed with HIV on January 3, 2001. I'm still coping with that development.  The ways it impacts my life & how I handle are constantly changing.   My parents divorced when I was 8, I still remember the day someone finally told me.  There are numerous nasty days in my life, days I don't want to dwell on, but they're always the back on my mind waiting for me to stumble over them. 

The point is, life marks us.  Some of these marks don't go away.  Some are nearly impossible to live with in any productive manner.  These marks & scars may make us who we are in life, but quite honestly, some of them I could've done without,  What would I have been like if I hadn't smoked for 16+ years?    Where would I be now if I hadn't contracted HIV?   These are things I'll never get to know,  Things I won't just get over.  

Before you tell someone, it's done, now time to move on with your life.   Remember, whatever happened marked them.  They aren't the same person anymore.   Nothing in their lives is exactly the same any more.  They have to come to terms that, if they can.  What you can or can't do, really isn't their problem, that's yours.

Cya...