Time to time,I come across a piece talking about an HIV+ person being upset others don't want to date them. I get, it can be difficult deciding when to tell someone your status. Should I tell them right before we're going to have sex? Should I tell them on the 1st date? Should I just use a dating app that lets me revel my HIV status? Seriously, awkward.
I get that & can even sympathize, but I can't get behind these + people who feel their entitled to date whoever they'd like. I don't care how advanced meds are or that you're viral levels are undetectable. You are still HIV+ & that's not going to change. These people have a right to be concerned. Other people have a right not to want to have to deal with that in their lives.
They may be uninformed, biased, scared or a lot of other things. But these people who don't wish to date a + person aren't necessarily bad people & they don't owe you anything. HIV is a difficult thing to handle for those living with it. It's probably mind boggling for many why anyone would want to date a + person when they weren't. Your virus may be undetectable, but things can change. It's still possible, even if highly unlikely, you could infect someone. These people have a right to be concerned.
Being involved with someone with any chronic illness, means you are also to some extent living with the effects of that illness. That's a lot for some people to take on. Better them just admit it & walk away, then bail when you need them later. You don't get to be angry at these people's sense of self preservation. They aren't required to take on your problems & yes HIV is a problem.
Stop whining. Start talking. Be up front about you status early on. If they walk away, that's their choice & not a reflection on you. Life never promised you a significant other. Live your life & let others live theirs. Not dating, is not the end of the world.
Cya...
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