What's This, What's That

When you're +, there's a continuum between paranoia and lackadaisical concern about your health. OMG, there's a rash, I have a fever or what's the suspicious purple spot?  Then it turns out to be a patch of dry skin, a cold & a bruise you got when the car door whacked your leg.  It could've been worse, much worse, an HIV related rash, the beginning pneumonia or the Big C.   Do you turn ever vigilante (paranoid) or do you just go all Doris Day and and say que sera, sera.

Now for the Yoda moment, "Balance, one must have."

You can't simply ignore your concerns, but you can't focus on them either.  You have to be a bit disciplined about this matter.  Something I'm not particularly good at.  If you notice something different or new, make a note of it.  If it's persists, checks it out with your friends or online info sources like Webmd.  If it persists further, causes you discomfort or the info you find is disturbing call you doctor.

The bad thing about HIV is after a while, a far too short of a time, you will probably know more about HIV, your personal condition & meds than your primary care physician.  Scary, but true.  Your primary doc is probably a generalist of some type.  He/she won't specialize in HIV or list of other ailments like, pulmonary, diabetes or rheumatoid arthritis for that matter.  That doesn't mean that your physician is bad, it just means you need a specialists.  Even then you're going to be more aware of your own situation than anyone else so speak up and don't let them ignore you.

Next week I'll have regular labs drawn again; CD4, CBC, CMP & a HIV-VL Ultrasenstive Quantitative.  Then I will hope that they get the labs drawn right and I don't have to get stuck again.  I hate needles.

If all goes well in about a week I'll have my labs back and look at the results.  Then I'll go see my porta-doc wherever they park the bus this month.  Hopefully, the doc will say your labs look good and send me on my way until the next appointment in the telemedicine bus.

I know it's a bit weird seeing your physician over a monitor in a bus, but it beats driving 120 miles for 30 minute appointment, then having to do the trip back home.  With the bus it maybe takes 45 minutes from start to scratch.  Doing the drive and seeing the doc, takes 4 - 6 hours depending on the traffic.  So I am very thankful for the telemedicine bus.

While it's easy to drive yourself nuts with health paranoia, you have to learn to relax about the matter.  You do what you can and what you can't, you can't.  It sucks and it may sound cavalier, but's it's what I can do.  I can take my med, watch my health (probably better than I do), have my labs drawn & see my doctor.  Those are the things I can do.  What can you do?