I'm not having a good week already. It's raining & miserable outside. It's some stupid holiday, non-candy oriented. The mail isn't running & the vet is probably closed. We're making final plans for 1 of our older cats. I just can't bring myself to do it this time. I don't know why. If I was by myself, I'd have to. I've not done well enough by this cat. I wish they'd all gone to homes with better, calmer people who had more resources for them. That just isn't me & it never will be.
There are a few new outdoor cats. Only 1 will let me interact with it at all. It's really fluffy & I can't pick it up long enough to determine gender. I could if I worked at probably get it to move in. I won't. I can't do this again. I'm + & getting older. My roomie isn't the healthiest, What would happen to the cat if we died? So, I'll feed it as I can & tell how pretty he/she is. That's not enough.
The little blue flowers in my yard are back. They normally make me happy, but not this year. It means Spring is really here & mowing & the like will have to begin again. Just the though tires me out.
I'm trying not to be that grumpy person. But all I really want to do is just go to sleep for a long time. I lost my last job in 98 & I started getting sick shortly after. I have been ill for nearly 2 decades & I'm tired. I've done very little & mostly I feel like it's all flopped.
The cat thing, indoor & out, has got to me. They're all or were basically strays. Little balls of fur no one wanted. I did, but I couldn't really take of them well. I did what I could. But it really wasn't enough. I get the stray thing. Most never find safe, warm, happy homes. Most just exist until they don't. This world can be truly terrifying. Most strays just want to feel secure Be nice to them, it could be you someday.
Be kind to strays & yourselves, maybe you can do better at that than I have.
Cya..
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