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Sunday, June 23, 2024

Nerves & Nostalgia...

 

It's getting Summer warm.   I'm nervous about a lot of stuff right now, especially the internet.  I spent all of yesterday wondering when it would drop again.  I still am.  

We've been out with my roomie's family the last couple of nights.   I'm not close to them, but being out, being somewhat social, just reminded of being a version of me I haven't been in quite a while.  I hate that.  I stopped moving, I stopped going out, I stopped being social, basically I stopped being.  I'm not sure I ever liked myself, but I really can't stand this version.  When this all started & I stopped being, I should've just drove off something.  I guess I just didn't have the nerve.  So now I'm paying for it.

Hopefully, the internet situation will get figured out.  I'll get through the heat.   I do miss being elsewhere.   But there isn't much to do here & I don't know anyone.   I really should've taken an exit decades ago.

Cya...

Saturday, June 22, 2024

Quick Before...

 

I'm posting before we lose the net again.  It happened again yesterday for over 8 hours.  We have to seriously look at other providers.  Optimum is just too horrible.  

My roomie has people in town & they have a memorial to go to this morning.  It'll be a quiet morning.  Hopefully with internet.   The warmer nights are here.  They'll probably stay throughout the season.

That's all for now, take care.

Cya....

Friday, June 21, 2024

1st Day Suck...

 

Let's start with Optimum Internet sucks every ass.  There that's handled.  Twice in a week they've dropped our net for over 14 hours.  It happened yesterday.  I just needed a simple day, but that didn't happen.  Now, I'm back to being gun shy about the net failing.   I didn't need that.

So much for things starting off on a good note.  Take care.

Cya...

Thursday, June 20, 2024

Summer Solstice...


Goodbye Spring, Summer is here. Hopefully it won't be much of a beast this year.  It's been a bit since we had a good season.  It'd be a welcome change.

That's all for now.  I'm still trying to recoup from all the stuff going on, maybe it'll happen.  The end of this week will be busy & different, so I'm not counting on it.

Take care.  Happy Solstice.

Cya...

Wednesday, June 19, 2024

Another Month...

 

I guess June's just going to suck like the previous months.  So much for descent mornings.  I didn't even bother looking at articles this morning.  I'm too tired, spent & irritated to focus on much.  To hell with substandard internet companies like Optimum.  Too bad they all seem to be crap.   I really hope whoever causes these internet outages & those who utterly refuse to communicate with anyone about ETA's would just fall over & be gone.   Nobody needs their grief.

Done ranting.  Now I just have to deal with the rest of the week's stuff.  Take care.

Cya...

Tuesday, June 18, 2024

Another Of Course Morning...

 


I guess my last few mornings weren't bad enough.  A lot of noise started around 6 & kept waking me.  When I finally get up, the internet was out.  Of course Sub-Optimum has no damned idea about restoration times.  I can't believe it, but they may actually be worse than Suddenlink.  The customer service definitely is.

Maybe more tomorrow.  Take care.

Cya...

Monday, June 17, 2024

Maybe...

 

It's cloudy & my mood is still in a funk.  I don't know when that's going to change.   I called the pharmacy.  They didn't get anything in today, but said my order should be in tomorrow.  Here's hoping they're right.  I don't need things screwing with my meds. 

It's going to be an odd week.  Besides our regular things, we have a few out of town things to handle.  After this week most of those things should be handled, but there could still be stuff in the wake of the matter. 

That's it for now, take care. 

Cya...

Sunday, June 16, 2024

Not 1...

 


I was hoping June would calm down.  I needed an easy morning after decent sleep.  I'm not getting either.  Little things keep happening & edging at my nerves.  I woke to crap noise outside & cats on the porch fussing.  I laid there just trying to rest.  Cause when I get up, I know the morning's going to be crap.  They almost always are anymore. 

I get up & the kitten has knocked a bunch of stuff over.  There's more BS outside.  I finally get to my computer & Iolo System Mechanic is trying to force a renewal on me for about $50.  I have to call those assholes & deal with their crap accents & shitty hard sales attempts.  I think it's cancelled.  If not I'll be calling my credit card. 

I'm spent.  I've been on the edge of breaking for years now.  But, it seems that something or someone always has more pressing needs & I can't deal with me.  I hate this.  I hate waking.  I hate just being here & it always being an unnerving crapfest.  The universe must hate me, it keeps having me wake up every morning.   Maybe if I could just let go, I wouldn't constantly feel like I'm vibrating so hard I could break.

On top of that I still don't anything about when my meds will get here.  I hope it's soon.  I have some extra, but this needs to end.  This is an HIV med.

So no, Apparently I can't have a good morning.

Cya...


Saturday, June 15, 2024

1st AC...

 

Yesterday was the 1st day we had the AC on.  It would've been at least the 2nd if not for needing a repair.  June is being a handful, but most of it is leftovers from last month.  Some of it we just didn't know about then, like the AC.

I slept well last night, but I need more.  I stay anxious from this lack of rest.  That level of anxiety makes it easy to freak out.  But then again, that's been me most of my life.  I don't see it changing ever. 

There shouldn't be much going on here today, take care.

Cya...

Friday, June 14, 2024

Little Better...

 

We have some shopping & errands to handle today.  Other than that, it should be a fairly nothing day.  I hope so, we could use it.  Things were quieter last night & I got to sleep better.  I'm still a little spent, but it's getting there.  My roomie's matters look to be getting lined up for her.  June got hit with a lot of leftover May crap.  

That's all for now.  Take care.

Cya...

Thursday, June 13, 2024

Still Ugh...

 

Today was going to busy for my roomie, but a thing got cancelled.  Normally, that wouldn't have been good, but she a lot going on, so it actually lessened the load.  It also meant sleeping in later.  At least it was supposed to, the kitten didn't get that memo.  I wasn't fond of his wake up method & he wasn't fond of my response.  Mornings are always going to the bane of my existence.   I believe people that truly love mornings, especially the perky twats, are just pure evil.

Take care.

Cya...

Wednesday, June 12, 2024

That Kind Of Morning...

 

This hasn't been the easiest starts to a month.  I guess I should've expected that.  There doesn't seem to be any of those left in my life.  It's either costs soaring, things breaking, people going, shows cancelling, etc & on & on.

But I had a sobering morning.  Every once in a while, I can sleep well enough that I'm not entirely aware of things for a bit.  For a few moments, I'm relaxed, alright, hell maybe even a little happy.  Then it all starts sinking in on me.  I'm still here in this place, this life.  Then I'm wide awake, anxious, frustrated & angry at existing.

Those few moments of peace, maybe even just seconds, cost me a lot when they fade.  Then I'm tense, upset & looking for the exit.  People should come with an "I'm Done" button.  Something that would just let them peacefully opt out.  I'd probably pushed mine when I was about 8.  I would've missed some scare fun bits & some nice people, but I would have avoided the crap show of my life.  I knew I shouldn't be here 5 decades ago.  But I kept lying to myself, things would get better, there'd be good things, finally I'd feel safe.  No one can lie to you, like you can lie to yourself.

I hate mornings.

Cya...

Tuesday, June 11, 2024

Fixed & Feeling...

 

OK, the AC is fixed.  It was a little pricey, but that was expected.  That's less on our plates, especially since it's supposed to get hot this weekend.  Yay for good repairmen. 

Talking about feelings seems to be a rage & has been for a while.  I call BS on a lot of these conversations.  Everyone has feelings, emotions & issues.  It doesn't mean we all share those same experiences.  

People like to talk about empathy & sympathy.  I don't think most people actually get those concepts.   Sympathy is understanding what someone is going though due having undergone something similar.  Empathy is the act of feeling someone else's experience.

When I was younger, when life & myself were much more chaotic, there were times I'd get very uncomfortable.  I'm slightly claustrophobic.  It's not about small places, it's about feeling trapped or constrained.  Sometimes when if I was having an off day & would be at a packed mall or store, I'd get anxious, even fractious. 

I've had people tell me it was due to me picking up on other people & their energies.  They were endowing me with empathy.  It wasn't empathy, it was bad math.   It was my weird reaction to small places & feeling like a trapped pinball with limited options on where to bounce.  Of course, when I got to a less congested area I felt less apprehensive.  It was bad math flow issues & my reactions.  It wasn't my ability to feel the energies of other people.

My roomie is going through a significant loss & I can try to be supportive.  However, I can't empathize or really sympathize.  I've never gone through something like this & have no real experience.  I could sympathize with her frustration over the AC issue or the worry it wouldn't get fixed before the heat set in.  I had & was experiencing the same.  But due to my life, I'm ignorant of the matters she's going through at this time.   

There's nothing wrong with not being able to sympathize with something.  You can still try to be supportive.  When I was just starting out on HIV meds, I had a bad reaction to a med & it left me utterly exhausted & so weak I could barely walk into the doctor's office.  My roomie had a serious health issue a while back that put her in a similar condition.   Later, she told me that until that point, she had never truly understood what I was going through or what that level of exhaustion was truly like.  Before she was trying to be supportive, unfortunately later, she could sympathize.  

Being supportive takes your willingness to be there.   Sympathy requires experience.  Empathy is a fantasy, super power or some person's need to interject themselves in another's situation or trauma.  They aren't feeling the other's experience, they're trying to highjack it.  They're trying to be relevant.  Support is being caring.  Sympathy is having knowledge.  Empathy as it is defined now, is narcissistic, manipulative crap.

Cya


Monday, June 10, 2024

Need To Get Started...

 

We have things to do this morning & need to find someone to fix the AC.   When I did sleep last night, it was fine.  The problem was I kept thinking about this morning & woke up early.   I hate waking up, nothing good ever comes from it.   It's just another facefull of  old fuckery & whatever new hell has decided to grace my life.  There are somethings in this life that aren't worth doing.  Waking is on that list.

I'll get cleaned up & then we'll go shopping.  Then the calls for a repair person will begin.   It'd be nice if this went smoothly.

Cya...

Sunday, June 9, 2024

Of Course That Happened...

 

There was an "Of Course" moment yesterday.  I went to turn on the AC for the 1st time & it didn't turn on.  I figured somehow it had come unplugged.  I was sort of right.  At some point, the kitten knocked some heavy stuff off a shelf & broke the AC plug.  Now we have to wait & see if the power cord can be replaced or if we have to get a new AC.  

I know I should've already tried it, but I can't keep up with everything on my own.  I just can't.  Most of the time I'm too scattered & exhausted to keep with much anymore.  I've spent a lot of the last few years overwhelmed, fatigued & anxious.  There always seems to be something going on with everyone & everything else.  It somehow always takes priority & I don't get better.  I'm tired & sometimes I just can't.  Then things slip through, because I'm usually the only person holding the proverbial bag.

I'm tired & I'm getting angry.  But everything & everyone else always has their reasons why that it's dumped in my corner.  Another thing to try to tend to.  I can't anymore

Cya...

Saturday, June 8, 2024

There's More Out There...

 

There's been a lot of talk & articles like this piece discussing the move away from condoms.   This is a choice made by people who think PrEP is the only thing they need.  Apparently, they forgot there are a lot of other STI's those meds don't treat.  Those range from the treatable to the forever, like herpes.  That fails to mention pregnancy. 

Because condoms take thought & effort, people have pulled away from their use.  There's a host of reasons from sensation to trust.  They only seem to worry about HIV.  They've gotten spoiled with PrEP.  Some even refuse any sex with a condom.  Condoms are viewed as outmoded & restraining.  Hell, the medical profession even changed from calling these illnesses from STD's to STI's because they thought the word infection was less stigmatizing than disease.  Can't offend anyone with reality, so lets try wordplay.

Condoms are cheap, easy & available.   They don't require a doctor.  If used properly, are as effective as nearly any other prevention besides abstinence.   There will never been safe sex, only safer.   But you do you & hope you don't catch something that used to be treatable & is now drug resistant.

Cya...

Friday, June 7, 2024

1st Week Of June...

 

The 1st week of the month is almost over.  The weather & other things have conspired to make this week a little tiring.   Maybe that'll get better.  All we have today is shopping.  Then we'll check the mail & come home.

That's all for this morning.  Most of the articles were merely rehashing points I've already posted over a lot.   Take care.

Cya...

Thursday, June 6, 2024

June Thursday....

 

It's been a little bit since there was nothing to do on Thursday.  A lot has been up in the air & things have had to be handled.  But today isn't like that.  At least, not so far.  

June bills that can be handled, have been.   It looks to be bright today.  The trash is gone.  Maybe today can just be a bit of nothing.

That's about it for now, take care.

Cya...

Wednesday, June 5, 2024

Yuck Night...

 

Between more storms & a rampaging kitten, sleep was elusive last night.  When I'd get to sleep either the weather or cat would wake me.  The last time the kitten woke me was right before 6.  It took me almost an hour to get back to sleep.  Then I overslept.  

This is it, we've got to get going.  We have to finish bills today.  Take care.

Cya...

Tuesday, June 4, 2024

Argh Not Article...

 

I saw the title of an article today that could've been very interesting.  Too bad that didn't work out.   The piece was about PFA's or "Forever Chemicals" and their impact on people living with HIV.  There were issues with the piece.  1st, it was about pregnant women & blood pressure.  2nd, it was too brief & said little.  It was the suggestion of an article, not an actual piece over something relevant. 

PFA's  are a health concern for everyone.  They may very well impact HIV+ people differently.  They could interact with the meds.  For those unsure of these matters, give the movie, Dark Waters a watch. 

That's all for.  There's been more rain.  Take care.

Cya...

Monday, June 3, 2024

June Bills Storm...

 

It's time to handle the 1st of the month stuff.  Of course, this is the day it decides to be dark & stormy.  I could handle the rain if it wasn't for all the gloom.   It's gotten to the point in my area, by the time you get solid sunlight, it's hot.

Other than bills & shopping, there were shouldn't be much going on this morning.   That's about it, take care.

Cya...

Sunday, June 2, 2024

Odd Beginning...

 

The month is starting on an off note.  It's things hanging over from last month that haven't been handled yet.  Even then, things will be very different for those impacted.  

This won't be forever.  Though for my roomie & hers, it might seem like it.  Loss is a series of blink fast incidents & long, drawn out spanses.  Neither is easily handled.

That's all for now, take care.

Cya...

Saturday, June 1, 2024

Hello June...

 

It's a new month & sadly there's always carry over from the previous month. Sometimes even year.   That's the case for my roomie & those around her.  There's no quick resolve for their issue & no fix.  This is a long road thing.   Maybe it's better that way.

June is here & 1st of the month stuff will start on Monday.   It's looks like warm weather may be closing in on us soon.   Maybe it'll kill some bugs.  I don't know why I say that.  Some of them die back a bit, but they're never completely gone.

Here's hoping the month treats you well.  Take care.

Cya...

Friday, May 31, 2024

Goodbye May...

 

May is almost over & I'd like to say it had been a  good month, but I can't.  May was a challenging month for a lot of reasons, few of which originated from within our home.  The majority of this was outside, intrusive, ridiculous crap.  It was the issues of others trashing our little semblance of peace.

People need to learn, they don't live in isolation.  Whatever they do or don't do will impact others & things around them.   It's like being in a pond, you're always causing ripples.  Those waves keep going & sometimes they topple over into other people's lives.

Goodbye May.  You weren't the worst month, but you were far from good or easy.

Take care.

Cya...

Thursday, May 30, 2024

Maybe Fixed...

 

There isn't much going on here this morning.  I'm glad for that.  My roomie's out with a friend & we had a friend over last night.  That's all kinds of being social for us.   For now, it's just me & the cats.

It would seem, at least for the moment, my banking issue has been resolved.  We'll see how long this last.  Maybe it'll take.

That's all for now, take care.

Cya...

Wednesday, May 29, 2024

Progress & Oversleeping...

 

Sort of a short post this morning.  The neighborhood was actually quiet this morning & I overslept a bit.  I probably needed it.  

My appointment went alright yesterday.  It was a just a meet & greet.   The process was explained, the prep was laid out & the beginning of the process is underway.  The actual screening won't happen until mid July.  I didn't realize it'd take that long.  I'll need some labs before hand & then it'll happen.  It's not over yet, but the ball's rolling.

That's it for today.  Take care.

Cya...

Tuesday, May 28, 2024

Early Dark Appointment...

 

The forecast doesn't call for rain today, but it's really overcast.   It's pretty dark this morning & I had to be up for an appointment.  The doctors want me to have a screening.  This morning is the initial meet & greet,  then the procedure will be scheduled.  

Not the greatest morning.  I'm up early.  It's dark.  I have an appointment.  The 1st of the moth stuff is starting.  I'm waiting to see if  a bank issue I had last month is resolved.   That'll take a few more days.   

The phone bill came in & it went up $30. The discount programs I was on (ACP) ended.  That's going to rack up.  Still, AT&T is about the most dependable in my area.  If not, I'd probably be changing.

That's it for this morning, take care.

Cya...

Monday, May 27, 2024

Another Holiday....

 

Not much will happen for us on this holiday.  When I was little, Memorial Day was decoration day.  Then they decided that it was only for vets.  Now you have to check with your local cemetery about hows, whens & whys of their decoration day.  

I don't put out decorations, so this won't affect me.   What will matter, is this will mess with banks & mail.  I don't need the bank today, but who knows what might be in the mail.  I dislike Monday holidays.  They cause more issues than if they were on Friday.

That's all for now.  Take care.

Cya...


Sunday, May 26, 2024

Rattled...

 

Easterly winds rattled my windows last night.  It's not common for them to make that much noise for that long.  Trains can make them rattle, but not for long.  Last night, it was happening most of the night due to the wind.  

I'm glad we don't have anything to do today.  I didn't sleep that well.  The noise kept waking me.  I'm glad that's not a common occurrence.  

That's it for now, take care.

Cya...

Saturday, May 25, 2024

Last May Weekend...

 

May is rolling out & this is the last Saturday of the month.  It'd be nice if June forward could be a nicer year.  I know it'll be hot, but maybe some of the other stress could back of for a while.  That'd be nice.  I doubt that will happen, but if I had my druthers. 

There isn't much going on here this morning.  Maybe it'll stay that way.   This last week wasn't supposed to be hard either, but that isn't what happened. 

Take care.

Cya...

Friday, May 24, 2024

Longest Study...

 

This piece is a history article.  The longest running studies of HIV/AIDS are 40 years old.  It's a good piece about the programs.  While the article doesn't offer much new info, sometimes it's good to remember what came before.  

The piece shows researchers & medical professionals are trying.  If there are lacking parts in the fight against HIV it's not them.  It's with those who represent us in politics, religion, education & our communities.  Any failure in this matter is with individuals & groups that refuse to acknowledge the reality of HIV.   Instead they want to promote stigma, ignorance & fear.  Some are just too disenfranchised to engage in their own care or well being.  I understand that, but it shouldn't impact others.

Give the piece a read & take care.

Cya...

Thursday, May 23, 2024

The Next Phase...

 

The issue my roomie is facing has moved into the next phase.  With most serious things we confront in our lives, there's rarely just the before & after.  It hasn't been that way for her & won't be from here out.

There was the before, the normal, the expected.  Then the music changed, the notes got jumbled, the tempo became erratic & then a crash.  The before, the normal, was over.

The came the uncertainty, desperate hopes & wishes.  Maybe the music would start again.  Maybe the needle just jumped the track.  But that didn't happen.  Eventually the sounds lessened & emotions sank.   Then the final rest & the piece was over.

Things go forward, but a major section of the band is missing.  The melody isn't right & there are gaps where there should be notes & rhythm.   Maybe the cruelest part of this stage is, like or not, the band does play on.

The piece will never be the same.  Even as new sounds are added & melodies are written.  There will always be the memory of what was there before.  This is just another phase in the process.  There will be more.

Maybe the missing piece has simply moved on to join another song somewhere else.  Maybe the missing part will be heard from time to time in other songs & voices.

I know I'm being a bit vague.  But this isn't my story or my process.  I'm in the audience watching the set be struck.  I don't have much more to write, except the beat goes on. 

Cya...

Wednesday, May 22, 2024

Possible Rough Weather...

 


This will be short.  We could have bad weather today.  Hopefully nothing goes out.  

The thing happening with my roomie, is ongoing.  She did what she could yesterday.  I'm not sure how long this will last.  This is a time where longer isn't better.

That's all for now.  Take care.

Cya...

Tuesday, May 21, 2024

Breastfeeding....

 

For decades the guidelines were for HIV+ mothers not to breastfeed for fear of viral transmission.  According to this article & many others, that has changed.  It seems the guidelines have switched to allow for HIV+ mothers with undetectable viral levels to breastfeed.  This is worth noting.

The academy (pediatrics) says the risk of transmission is very low when those conditions are met. However, completely avoiding breastfeeding is the only option with zero risk for HIV transmission to the baby.

So even at undetectable levels, the research still touts abstinence  as the only completely safe option.  It's a new direction.  Not sure how I feel about it.  However, it's not something I'll have to deal with.   Still, I wouldn't want to be the parent who thought things were safe only find out they weren't.

Cya...

Monday, May 20, 2024

3rd Week...

 

We're starting the 3rd week of May.  It's starting to get warm & TV shows are ending already.  This was a dud season.  It's supposed to be stormy this week.  We don't need any severe weather.

The issue affecting my roomie is ongoing & there isn't a lot of news at the moment.  It's just waiting to see how things go.  At this time, I think a quick resolve whichever way would be the best for those concerned.  Little good will come from this lingering.

That's all for now.  Time to go shopping.  Take care.

Cya...

Sunday, May 19, 2024

Unexpected...

 

My roomie got a call last night.  I wasn't in the room, but I could hear the serous tone.  Someone close to her is going through a health scare & the outcome isn't known yet. Now, it's a wait & see.  There's nothing she can do about it.  The matter's ongoing.  Waiting sucks, but it could be worse.

That's it for now, take care.

cYA...

Saturday, May 18, 2024

Just Off...

 

I'm staying just a little off & not sure why.   It could be late season SAD, my sleep being off, a minor sense of dread.  Whatever it is, it has me on edge, anxious & irritable.  I've no patience or spoons for anything.  

So far, the weather's better today.  The jerks didn't show up early & start pounding on the neighbor's house.  I got some sleep.  Maybe I can start coming back. 

The problem is crap keeps happening so fast I'm not catching up.  I'm not regrouping & I'm staying shot.  If there was a button that would off most the stupid, irritating people in the world & let things be for a bit, I'd hit like I was playing whack-a-mole.

The way I'm feeling, most of the world could drop & I'd be fine.   Maybe more sleep & better weather will help some.  That'd be nice.

Cya...

Friday, May 17, 2024

Wrap & Begin...

 

All the bills were handled this week.  Next month's gas bill is here already.  It always comes early.  We'll pay it soon, probably when I pick my meds on Monday.  

Having this handled, used to be a relief for me.  But after the last year, I find little to be much of source of anything really positive.  I'm to the point when something goes off, I'm not surprised.  It's more like, of course it did.  Why wouldn't it screw up?

It'd be nice not to be at this point, but my resources are tapped.  My sleep has been better, but I'm still  running on low.   The neighbor's been having work on her house done & it's taking forever.  It's already been over a week.  Those people get here early & they're loud.  More sunlight, less rain & less rackett would be nice.

That' all for now.  At least bills are paid.

Cya...

Thursday, May 16, 2024

Pertinent...



I've blogged about this before, but here we are again.  Sometimes it gets difficult to find publications pertinent to this blog.  This was never easy.  I wanted to post about being a HIV+ Gay man living in rural Oklahoma.  Now, it's also about someone 50+.  

Now, unless it's about an ethnic/racial group, writing about Gay men is a non-starter.  Writing about anyone not appearing ethnic isn't high on the list either.  There's the occasional piece on aging with HIV, but that's usually to discuss comorbidities.  All the articles on HIV in the rural U.S. written in the last decade probably wouldn't fill a midweek newspaper, sales advert. 

I know, I'm ranting a little.  But with all this talk of inclusion in representation, they left something out.  For all this alleged contemporary inclusion, there's a lot of exclusion.  It seems I'm in all those things on the out list again.  Maybe people like Larry Kramer should've just stayed quiet & let this thing run it's course.

Cya... 

Wednesday, May 15, 2024

Mid Wednesday...

 


Nothing much is going on this middle Wednesday of May.  The only plans we have is to run an errand & handle the trash.  That's OK, we'll take a slow week.  

The weather's beginning to warm up.  The humidity is beginning to be an issue.  But, that's the time of the year.   Still, it makes my feet achy.  I have to keep note of that & not let it become a real issue.

That's all for now, take care.

Cya...

Tuesday, May 14, 2024

Not Much Success Or Z's...

 


I haven't had the best sleep this last week.  I'll be fine if this settles soon.  I go through this sometimes.  It's never fun.

I've stated how I dislike when researchers promote their projects as done deals.  It can be hard for lay people to accept that these scientists are talking about the desired outcomes of their endeavors.  Often, those results don't materialize.

For some time, researchers have been touting CRISPR as a means of eliminating or at least controlling HIV.  Neither have proved accurate as it stands with the latest research.  This may happen some day, but not now or soon.  Presenting research in this manner is misleading & bordering on a con.  Every scientist knows there's always a significant risk of failure.  Presenting their case without noting the expected possibly of a bad outcome is preceding in bad faith.

Stop getting people's hopes up & just stick to the facts.  

Cya...

Monday, May 13, 2024

Bad Options...

 

This was my last phone bill where I'll get a discount from the assistance program ACP.  No sense in going into detail about ACP since it's over.  The only point is it took $30 off my bill.  The government didn't refinance the program, so it ended.  

I'm on AT&T.  It's at the high end for mobile service.  However, it's the only company that keeps good signal & speed nearby.  Most of the time, we could probably deal with another company.  But, when the power or internet goes out, that service is all we have.  That's when the other companies lesser functionality would hurt us.  

I found another program, Lifeline.  I  qualified, then  found out  AT&T doesn't handle that discount in my state.  They gave me the option of looking at the lifeline page for providers in my area that did.  I hadn't heard of most of them.   I'd have to drop AT&T & go to some 2nd stringer or worse, some local mickey mouse operation.   Lifeline's discount is $9.25 a month.  I'm not sure less than $10 is worth the risk.

I'll talk to my roomie.  Time to get around for the day.  Take care.

Cya...

Sunday, May 12, 2024

Warm, Wet & Dark...

 

It's been warm, overcast & wet.  That leads to something, bugs.  There's been a lot of flies, some wasps & other flying annoyances.   But, the worst of it is fleas.  Until it gets warmer & brighter, it's flea season.   With all the birds, squirrels, outdoor cats & other animals, controlling fleas is nearly impossible for a bit.  Once it gets brighter, warmer & dries out some, they'll die back.  For now, it's war.

Cya...

Saturday, May 11, 2024

So Far Pleasant...

 

I get irritated with my life.  This morning has been bright & it's supposed to be a nice day weatherwise.  I don't trust it.  Maybe it's too nice, a set up.  So I'll lower my guard.  I dislike being this suspicious.  But when I'm not, things tend to go off the rails.  I'd rather be alert & have a good day, than be caught unaware as things fall apart.

I'd love to say I was being paranoid.  But life has taught me, it can't be trusted.

Take care.

Cya...


Friday, May 10, 2024

Better, But...

 

I slept much better last night & it's a bright morning.  I'm still fairly spent though.  It's going to take a bit to recover.  Recovering from sleep loss isn't a single night thing.  

I think all we have to do today is shopping.  I'm pretty happy about that.  I'd do more if we needed to, but I think I'd for not if we don't.

That's it for now, take care.

Cya...

Thursday, May 9, 2024

Ugh Night...

 

A storm came through last night.  It wasn't bad, but it blew up a lot stuff & changed the air pressure a lot.  Within a bit, I was feeling fairly off.  I went to bed a little early.  Not that it did me much good.  

I woke a bit later cold & my head was drenched.  Apparently, I'd had more of a fever than I'd thought.  It had broke, but I wasn't feeling well.  I got back to sleep until about 6, when every possible noise went off & keep going for about half an hour.  

I never really got back to sleep.  I'm not feeling that well.  I'm sure I'll be pleasant today.  BTW, screw trains.  For whatever damn reason there were 6 of the damn things blaring through in less than 30 minutes.  I hope they all have as bad a day as I did night.

Cya...

Wednesday, May 8, 2024

Laws Are Needed...

 


This link is among the numerous posts online for this today.  The article details the investigation & arrest of an HIV+ man from Idaho.  He sought to spread HIV to as many men & boys as possible.  He admits having sex with between 30 - 50 men & boys without revealing his actual HIV status.  Who knows how many he infected.

These men can get treatment.   Maybe they should've known better.  Maybe it's not a life sentence.  Still, the onus was on him to reveal, as much it was for them to protect themselves.   This man is going to prison.   He may not have killed these people.  But he destroyed their lives as they had known them.  Nothing for them will ever be the same.  

We need laws against purposely spreading diseases, whether it's HIV or something else.  No one should have the right to knowingly infect another person.  Especially with something that has no cure.

I wish finding out about this was surprising, but it isn't.   That's all for now.

Cya...

Tuesday, May 7, 2024

Maybe Worked...

 

There's been an issue with a deposit to my bank.   The people at the other end haven't been much help.  They gave me a couple of options.  I tried switching accounts.  It seems to have worked.  I'll have to wait until next month to see if it holds.

That's it for this morning.  At least it's brighter day. Take care.

Cya...

Monday, May 6, 2024

Hazy May...

 


After all the clouds & rain, this morning is pretty hazy.  It could get a bit muggy.  Last night was a little chillier than I expected.  Just the sheet didn't cut it after a while.

I'm still trying to figure out a bank thing.  We'll handle the rest of house bills today.  I think shopping & bills will be about it for our plans.

Take care.

Cya...

Sunday, May 5, 2024

Rainy Sunday...

 


It looks like it's going to be dark & rainy all day.  It's not warm enough at the moment for having the doors & windows open.  It'd be nice if this didn't turn muggy.  Weather Channel's rain measurements are off again.  Every place else has us at 4"+.  They have only recorded a 0.5".  Some of their sensors must be down.

Not much is going on today, so this about it.  Take care.

Cya...